Time for action

Just know when I avoid posting, I'm still shoving my face with food that I should not be eating. I am so feeling it. More so than the last time I posted. You would of thought that me weighing myself would've left me in utter shock but it didn't. Instead I was like "OH it's not AS BAD as I thought". Such a sicko...ok but now my friends, my stomach is super fat. My fat clothes are getting "filled in". When I sit I have serious back fat. I look so disgusting right now it's not even funny.

The most progress I have made is taking the yellow tail tuna that my husband brought back from his fishing trip out of the freezer. That was yesterday. Instead of baking the tuna though you know what I did? I made these cookies by Paula Deen - Oatmeal coconut chocolate cookies. I brought them to work though so they would eat them. I can't afford to eat many of these. I can't afford to eat anything fattening that's for sure. I think working from home has done this to me. I just snack here and there and it's killing me!

I feel incredibly guilty too for the way I have been feeding the family. I've been baking like a mad woman and feeding them lots of mexican soul food. Yesterday Alexis threw on dress I bought her back in December and it's tight. She didn't think so but I could tell she's gaining weight and it's my fault. :-(

I've been letting Alani snack on junk food too much too. I tried to cut up and apple the other day and give it to her instead of giving her a snack zip lock bag of chips or some other fried something-or-other and she refused the apple!! She LOVES fruit and veggies. So that was like a slap in the face saying "See looks what you are doing"!!! So it is with not so great pleasure that I put together a healthy eating and excercise for the family TODAY! We are going camping from Sunday to Tuesday and I was just thinking well it won't be the healthiest of eating....but WHY NOT!? Why not take fruit and veggies to snack on. Why would I need to take chips and cookies instead? I've brainwashed myself quite a bit and it's very irritating.

Today I start my meds again and my water drinking like crazy to help with my non-stop hunger/cravings. It's B A D right now for me. I know that Sergio can tell too. He knows how disappointed in myself too. He can see I am not happy. I have SO many cute clothes and I can't fit into ANY of them right now.

Ok well no more whining it's seriously time for action. So I will need to put together a menu, snacks included. I was going to say snacks and drinks included but I am going to aim to WATER. I am going to encourage water drinking to all in my family including Alani. I will buy SOME diet drinks though when we have our meals.

Anyhoo, if you got through this rambling post, congrats. God bless!