I have been wanting to post the pictures of what I look like NOW but it's too much for me to handle. I took a photo sideways and also of my front view and it's not a pretty thing. I can't believe I am that fat. So I went to create my virtual model - I created one on how I look now and then what I will look like when I hit my goal weight. I kept thinking my BEFORE model looked too fat and I kept trying to make her more skinny. Ok I AM FAT. I cannot make the virtual model skinnier if I am not. I know I have a little bit of an advantage because I am 5'10 so I always think I look thinner, but really, I don't. Anyway. I have no idea how to post this pic on my sidebar. I am not really HTML and all that savy. So I am just going to post it on this post for now. I would like to look at it all the time to remind me of what I used to look like.
Yesterday I was looking at my body in the mirror and I can't believe how fat my stomach is and I hope that I don't have a lot of loose skin afterwards. I have never had loose skin with my past weight loss but that was BEFORE I had kids. Who knows what it's going to look like after weight loss AND 3 kids later with my first being a c-section. I told my husband that most likely I would need a tummy tuck to get rid of that disgusting c-section tummy. I don't think that it will go away completely. I have heard many of girls (skinny and all) talk about that c-section tummy that will not go away. So maybe I will have 5K laying around to fork out for a tummy tuck after my weight loss. While I am at it I might as well tell them to build me a nice buttocks and remove the fat between my thighs. Ewww...you know that fat that makes your legs rub together? I hate it. Funny cause in my family I am the tallest girl, the only one with DD boobs, freckles, fat thighs and definitely more outgoing or talkative than my other siblings. I am the black sheep of the Fam-Bam.
I did not go to church last night because I really did not feel like getting everyone sick. Plus my husband gave me this horrified look when I had a cough attack and could not stop coughing until I drank water. He was like "You're staying home". I had planned on it. My poor Gabriel was sleeping anyway and I didn't want to wake him up. He had been totally fussy all day. His butt burns I think, it looks like it stings. I am going to have to call the Dr. today so they can give him some medicated rash ointment cause we are putting all this stuff on there and it only helps while it stays on. His diarrhea is a little better with the expensive formula but it's not entirely 100%. I am going to try and find out the results of his lab work. I almost wish it was a bacterial thing so they get him on meds and make him better already!!
Well at least today is Friday! I am SO looking forward to sleeping in this weekend. This getting up at 3:30am has me tired as heck. Well that's it for now. I need to go into Fitday and write down my food plan of attack for the day. I actually brought a sasndwich for lunch!!! God bless.
It seems like when I get home my cold and cough kicks in. It sucks because I think I might of given the baby my cough. I heard him coughing this morning when my husband was burping him and I was walking out the door. I had to drink some of that nasty disgusting Nyquil to fall asleep. It tastes like liquored up licorice (spelling?) yuk. I slept good though and I did not want to get up. Scratch that, I could not get up. I heard the alarm going off but I didn't get the idea that I was to actually get up to snooze it or turn it off...I finally came out of my sleep comma and got up.
I updated my FitDay which is what I really wanted to get done. I didn't get a chance this morning. I was not able to keep my dinner down last night because of all my coughing...yuk I know. There's not much really going on with me today. I feel like my fat gut has gone down a bit and I resisted weighing myself because I was afraid of being dissapointed. So I will wait till Monday for weigh in. Maybe I will just wait the entire month of January. We'll see if I can resist.
My sister called me yesterday and said she had lost 10 pounds! I am so proud of her and glad that she took the doctors concers seriously. She also invited me to go to Vegas in April for her birthday. Sounds like a lot of fun. By then the baby will be 7 months old and will be much easier to care for. I had to run it by Serg to make sure he was cool with it. He really did not give me a reply cause I pretty much told him I was going. I am sure he will throw a little hissy fit when it comes closer to when I have to go. I can't wait to get better so I can work out! My ultimate dream would be to loose 50 pounds by then but that would be like me having to loose 3 1/2 pounds per week in 14 weeks. I think it can be done but will it? We will have to wait and see. This week I probably have lost 2 pounds. I have been eating salad for lunch pretty much all week so I need to get better so I have the energy to make different things for lunch and dinner.
Geesh what else??....Well for now, that's it if I can't think of it now, then it's too much boring info. God bless.
So my plans never go as well....planned. LOL. Things don't go horribly wrong, they just change. We didn't go to the gym but that's ok because I threw in a workout DVD and was surprised at how non complicated it was. I've always steered away from workout DVD's because I always remember the days when I jumped into an aerobics class at the gym and felt like a complete fool. Everyone in the class had all the movements memorized and the aerobics instructor was this stick thin lady that was going a mile a minute. Those classes are so not for beginners. Anyway, I need to buy myself several things to make the workouts more efficient, like the resistant bands, that small heavy ball (forgot what it's called) and some decent weights. My husband has weights but they are total guy weights. I don't want to work out with these honkin' metal things. So as thrifty as I am, I will be keeping a close eye at the open air markets. I am sure I can find a great. The workout DVD I have now (brand new) I bought for $1 as opposed to $15 bucks.
I was also on Craiglist last night looking to buy a used stationary bike. There were some super great deals on there. There was a total gym in there for $50 bucks so I might need to jump on that ASAP. I need to talk to my hubby first though. We didn't get much "us" time yesterday as I had a Dr's appointment for my son's diarrhea issue. I don't know if I mentioned it but he's had it for 2 weeks and does not seem to be tappering off. I took him, he has 2 ear infections (I was surprised to hear that) and has some sort of weird protein allergy. I guess this specific form of protein is in milk based and soy based milk. He's on soy milk already so I really thought it might be a parasite or SOMETHING. Well the answer was no and he switched him to Nutramigen which is that super expensive formula. Good thing I came back to work when I did. Anyway, as long as he gets better, I will fork out the cash for him. He started on it right away and guess what? No diarrhea all night. For almost two weeks everytime I change his diaper, it was a poopy diaper. So I was shocked. It's working!!!!
Ok on to other things. Um.....I never took Alexis to the library as Serg had to go to a meeting with our church regarding our new building. She was upset but she's impatient just like I was when I was a kid. My mom was telling my husband all about it and he was like "Really"????? So I am going to try and take her today.
Ok healthier eating subject....ok so on Discovery Health challenge it "allows" me to have 1800 calories but the menu's it creates for me are never more than 1400 calories so I am sticking to 1000 to 1300 calories per day. I will keep cutting that down if I don't see the scales move within 2 weeks or so. I need to be good on the weekend. I can't stress that enough. I need to make myself yummy food so I don't feel like I am missing out. The only way I am going to accomplish healthy eating on the weekend is if I make my entire family eat healthy. Ultimately that is my goal. Alexis is overweight for a 10 year old and I want to start teaching her how to eat healthy so she does not struggle in the future. She is at risk of developing childhood diabetes so it's pretty serious stuff....I just don't like to address it. I think I feel like it really puts pressure on me to really do this and I don't like pressure. It's got to be done though. Alani is slender and hates fast food LOVES veggies and home cooked meals. I think I read somewhere that most 2 year olds are vegetarians. I know she totally is. She always avoids the meat on her plate. She will eat SOME chicken but not much so I have to make sure she gets her protein elsewhere.
So putting in my "Meal Plan" on FitDay REALLY does help keep me in line. I think twice about sticking stuff in my mouth because I know that if I do, I HAVE to put it into FitDay. I do this in the morning because then it won't get done and having an eating plan really helps. Sometimes there are changes in my dinner but I still keep it healthy and I make the changes on FitDay.
I believe that is it for today...I might come back here later when I think of other things. Till later. God Bless.
I read part of yesterday's post and I felt the energy coming from it (when I talked about working out). Unfortunately I never got to the gym because I had to load all of the pictures I had on my work laptop to photobucket and that took a good two hours :-( I went for a short walk with florence yesterday but that's pretty much it. We went to Albertson's to buy the dressing I wanted (the asian sesame ginger) and my lunch was delish!
It was really cold too and my throat is killing me so I think we are going to have to skip the walks outdoors in this cold weather this week. I am just super scared of getting really sick like last year when I got bronchitis and was sick for 4 months! I couldn't even breathe. So I am hoping that this throat pain and my man voice goes away this week. I am going to atleast try to make it to Bally's this week. Sergio wants to go with me so I need to sign him up for the Discovery Health challenge as well and print a pass for him. When I get home I have to follow a pretty strict regimen or the day will be gone just like that. When I get home today, these are my plans:
1) Start dinner
2) While Sergio goes to Walmart with the baby, Alexis, Alani and I will go to the library. I am just going to have him pick us up when he is done. He wanted to go to Sears too which is right around the corner from the library.
3) Eat dinner or go to the gym first? It depends on if Cindy can watch the baby for an hour. I don't want to leave the kids at home with him. He's too fussy and Alani acts up with her so I don't want to leave Alexis in charge of both brats.
4) Read our bible, pray and go to bed.
I need to start going to bed at 8! I just can't get myself to do it. I feel selfish when I want to go to bed early because the baby is up and Alani is tired, but hyper. This is the time where she gets in trouble the most. I think maybe what I will do is put her down for bed as well so if the baby is up, serg can just kick it with him and Alexis will be out of her shower and just winding down for her bedtime at 9pm.
I added some new links to my site. Some new blog reads. I took those off where the gals where not loosing any weight because they were having issues. Not that it's a bad thing, but I have issues and I NEED motivation. I need to read about loosing and how GREAT it feels and how great they feel. It inspires me. What I was finding myself doing with the "non-loosers", it was sorta dragging me down and I was playing into some of their excuses (which were legitamate in alot of cases). I still read their blogs and hope that they get the inspiration and that their problems get resolved. It's great to see when the cloud of glooms stops looming around them. I am the type of person that is happy for other people, that's why I want to loose this weight so I can encourage others. I can't help others loose weight when I myself can't do it.
This is a wonderful scripture to keep in your heart - especially now, during this time of DECISION:
James - Chapter 1 verse 5 & 6
If any of you lacks wisdom, let him ask of God, who gives to all liberally and without reproach, and it will be given to him.
But let him ask in FAITH, with no doubting, for he who doubts is like a wave of the sea driven and tossed by the wind.
Ok let's see I had like a million things in my head on the way to work today and now I can't think of what to write.
Ok first and foremost I would like to thank Florence for accepting my friendly challenge to loose the flab. I honestly think I am up for a pretty decent challenge this time! I am kinda scurred. But alas I am prepared. I started to feel like I was coming down with something after church let out yesterday afternoon so I went home, made lunch for everyone (including myself), put Alani down for her nap, the baby was asleep and I changed into my pajamas and took a nap. Until the bubbly wubbly woke up that is (that's one of Gabriel's silly names). He was such a cry baby yesterday and refused to sleep almost the entire afternoon & early evening. Sergio and Alexis went to the grocery store cause sergio saw that I looked like a disgruntled housewife and knew I was not going ANYWHERE. So he ran to grab groceries and went to costco. My lovely husband bought me more fish and while the baby and I skipped out from the evening service at church, I baked cookies for my husband (he kept bugging me to make them), baked salmon and tilapia, then made dinner. In between baking cookies and fish, I gave the baby a bath because he just kept trippen and would not let me cook. So I wrapped him up tight, put him on my bed and he nodded off for about 30 minutes. Enough time for me to put dinner together.
The good thing is he slept from 10pm to 4am. He was THAT tired. Before I ran out the door this morning, I changed his poopy diaper, gave him a bottle, woke Serg up so he would not forget to burp him and ran out the door with a million things in my hand. It was Freezing!! I think it was 39 degrees. BRRRR...my throat feels like crap and yes, I am tired even though I got a whole 5 hours sleep. I wanted to go for a walk today with Florence but since this cold is trying to get me, I figured I should workout indoors so this cold does not put me out of commission for a while.
Last night some dude from Bally's called and offered me free training. He said "I see you signed up for the Discovery Health Challenge and wanted to offer you free training." So I think I want to go check it out tonight and see what all this involves. I need to cancel my 24 hour fitness membership since it's too far from my work and my house, I know I will never go. The locations are just not convenient for me. I am going to stick with Curves for another few weeks then if I like Bally's and they are reasonable I will get a membership with them since it's pretty close to my house and then cancel Curves. Plus I can ride my bike there....extra workout.
Today while I was driving here I was trying to motivate myself by remembering how nice it felt to be able to slip on tons of clothes, just like that. A lot of times I change like 50 times because I look fat in everything. I want to be able to pick an outfit, and stay in it. Period. I need to be healthier too, I truly do. I say that time and time again in here, but I really need to think about my health. I have high blood pressure and an extremely high risk of developing diabetes. In fact, I KNOW I will be a diabetic when I am older if I don't loose this weight. I need to be an example to my sister as well. I want to motivate her to loose weight. She was thinking about doing Nutri System, since she does NOT cook and has NO CLUE waht to eat, this would be good for her. So I need to do this!!! Working out is a pain in the butt at first but I know that once I get to doing it there's no stopping me. Alright enough blabbering. Till tomorrow. God bless.
Ok note to self: Even if I am itching like crazy do NOT take Benadryl. I have all these bites on me, I literally counted like 14. ALL on my left side and man do they itch. I took a nice hot shower last night and since I was still feeling itchy I took a Benadryl and it knocked me out cold. The problem is that I have to get up with Gabriel and man I almost lost my balance 3 times. I could only manage to open one of my eyes. Sheesh. Right now I am still dead tired. It was cold so on the way here I had to turn on the heater in my car and that made me even sleepier. I made my coffee extra strong today and it barely woke me up. The only way I stayed awake on the drive here was to put my music up a little more and sing along. Good thing nobody could hear me cause I cannot sing.
So today is day 4 of my "healthier" eating and I feel WAY less bloated, I mean I feel like I lost 10 pounds in 2 days. My bloating was horrendous. The other really weird thing is my period dissapeared last night. I hope it was a period and not bleeding from the IUD. I'll have to look it up online and see if this was just a side effect of it. The IUD does not have any hormones whatsoever so I am hoping it's still in there ok.
I brought the same thing for lunch as I did yesterday. I am all about simplicity. Dinner was good last night. I made lean pork stir fry. No oils at all. I added extra veggies but I did have a little bit of white rice. Just a tid bit though, like 1/4 of a cup and I mixed it in well. Oh and I had a short glass of milk. I am a milk drinker and I had not had any so I "treated" myself to some.
Man I can't but keep thinking how tired I am. I had things I wanted to talk on here about but I can't remember.....S L E E P Y...........God Bless.
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=H1sHAX2F4PE
I should not say that. I am doing GREAT! I just don't feel so great.....cause I am still very bloated from you know what...ugh..Today is day 3 that I have been on Metformin (glucophage) and I feel better today. Yesterday though I felt like crap! I felt like I was going to throw up every 5 minutes. I read that drinking milk helped but I am at work! Actually there probably is milk in the vending machine, anyway, out of desperation I took a few Tums and I felt 100% better. Every now and then I would feel a little woozy but not terrible. The TERRIBLE part was that I was SOOOOOOOOOO sleepy. I hardly slept the night before because the baby kept fussing and I am a pretty light sleeper when it comes to the baby. I drank like 4 cups of coffee and it kept upsetting my stomach but that's the only way I would stay awake. I was just cranky all together yesterday. I went home and could not seem to take a nap. Instead I got up and started cleaning my house. Serg has been helping me with house work but guys just do not clean right. He does a great job at doing laundry and vaccuming but he does not like washing dishes and he does NOT mop the floor. I have to mop my kitchen floor, and if my kitchen is not squaky clean, then I feel like my house is a disaster area and I will seriously be in a BAD mood. My hubby made chicken soup for dinner and it was perfect for the cold evening. MMMM.
Anyway, what else. I was talking to one of my co-workers, in fact she reads my blog, HI FLORENCE!, and she said she would start going on walks with me during lunch. I just need to bring my sneakers, pants and a t-shirt. I will probably start going to Curves for a while too during lunch 2 times a week here in Westlake. I can walk with her 3 times a week or go there when it rains and we can't walk. Hey Florence ya wanna be my competition buddy to loose weight?!! Nobody seems to be as serious as you and you already know what foods to eat and not to eat....so let me know!! Call me a weirdo but like I mentioned before I need to compete to get motivated to loose weight. I want to look babealicious for my hubby in the summer AND go crazy shopping.
Oh I tried a sample of "Ken's Steak House" brand Sesame and Ginger Asian low fat dressing and oh my soul! It even tastes better than my #1 favorite dressing from Paul Newman. So I am going to go out and buy it tonight. I had a nice huge salad for lunch today with a Salmon filet. So filling and so the bomb. I can't go into Bally's with my free pass till the 13th. I thought it was the 10th but I thought wrong. I looked it up on the site yesterday to print my pass, which I still need to do now that my work printer is hooked up. Ok I am getting boring....gonna sign off for now. God bless.
Man I felt so great yesterday waking up to come to work for the first time in months. Today, not so good. Gabriel kept kinda crying last night, more like complaining and he was probably just hungry. I was just tired and I didn't "get it". Anyway, I woke up later than usual but I am still so tired. I got my IUD put in on Monday and since then I have been bleeding and cramping. The cramping hurts but the bleeding is not super heavy. It's like day 4 bleeding type thing of a regular period.
So yesterday worked out to be pretty good. I came to work, drove home, got home and played with the baby and Alani and talked to Alexis about her day. Then Gabriel and I took a nap. I took about an hour nap but I was supposed to go to bed at 8pm. We figured since I am getting up at 3am to go to work and between 8pm and 3am I am getting up to feed the baby once and I will be up for about half an hour I should be going to bed that early so I don't feel like I feel right now. I am thinking about taking a nap during my lunch. I might just do that. I think this "period" cramping feeling is making me more tired. Sucks. I need to drink lots of water. I think I might be dehydrated. I know the baby is dehydrated because he's had diarhea for like 4 days now. My husband is giving him pedialite though so hopefully that will help him a bit. He has a bad rash from pooping so much so I gave him a bath last night and let him soak in there for a bit in hopes that it would soothe the rash. I plan on giving him another bath tonight.
So I joined the Discovery Health Challenge. You get 8 weeks I think of a membership to Bally's and menu's for breakfast lunch and dinner. I need to go on there again to print it and also to chec out my menu's and log in my weight. I baked my salmon this morning and plan on having it for lunch. I need to go to Costco to buy some salad but I probably won't go until Friday or so. I can't wait till this weekend. Well I am going to come back here later and blog because I totally feel like crap right now. I am going to take my meds and some tylenol and see if that helps. Till later. God bless.
I suck because I didn't stick to my new eating habits. I gave in to the old "well it's the holidays I will just start over when they are over". I could of totally been down a good 15 pounds. Instead I feel WAY fat and not sure how much I even weigh. I know I've been eating a whole lotta tamales, cheesecake and cookies.
The GOOD news is I know that I will loose the weight. Instead of feeling helpless and praying that some miracle pill comes on the market so I will loose the bulk, I feel powerful and once again inspired. I just got off the phone with a high school friend that keeps in touch. She actually called to wish me a happy belated birthday. I have not seen her for 5 or 6 years yet she remembers my birthday and calls me about every 3-4 months. I am not very good at staying in touch with people. I deal with the people currently in my life and the events currently happening in my life. I THINK about old friends and possibly calling them but I don't. ANYWAY, she was telling me that her youngest daughter is almost 6 years old and she's the biggest she's ever been and how she wants to loose weight.
Immediately a bell goes off in my head and I tell her that I want to visit Northern Cali in March or April and wouldn't it be great if we would set a weight loss goal so when we saw each other we would look great. She said "yeah that would be cool" but didn't seem like she wanted to commit. It seemed like she did not KNOW what to do to loose weight. I gave her some suggestions but there are SO many things to keep in mind that I felt I would overwhelm her. Plus way back when fat people would give me suggestions I wo9uld think "Now why don't YOU use the information you are giving me if it works so well". So that's kinda how I felt. A fat person telling another overweight person HOW to loose weight. I think that in February when I reach my NEW goal of 30 pounds (that's an ambitious goal and I am going to really push myself on) I am going to call her again and let her know how I am doing. I WOULD love to meet up with her and for us both to look and feel great. I am not one of those friends that wants all their friends to feel like crap because you look good. I need to call my sister Nancy too and motivate her as well.
I dunno, maybe I am weird. For me to be successfull in weigh loss, I need to get into a friendly competition with someone. I was successfull when I did with Laura at work and it was working for her too. I tried to get into this competition with my sister too but I need to help her committ 100% to this. My friend is going on a cruise in May so if I motivate her in February she will have 3 months to get it together.
I thank God for letting me have the knowledge on loosing weight. I am SO glad that I am not expecting a miracle weight loss drug to solve my weight problems. All it takes is taking control on eating, meal planning and exercise.
I can't wait and am super excited once again! God bless!
Let me get my weight loss stuff outta the way so I don't forget to blog about it. I weighed myself this morning and I am now down to 230.8. Yeay for me. I have been trying pretty darn hard to stick to these protein days. I have to admit that I did cheat. I ate a banana and about 8oz of milk last night and the night before. I don't know what it is about the evening but I get hungry. Well at least I cheated with a fruit and some milk and not a candy bar or cookies. Regardless I am loosing. I am almost down 6 pounds from two weeks ago so I am. pretty happy about that. I need to check in with my sister Nancy to see how she is doing. A lot fo times it's hard for me to figure out what to eat and I have been a dieter for years so I am sure it's really hard for her. When I don't want to bother thinking about what to make myself to eat I just eat a protein bar and that seems to have kept my cravings at bay. THe crazy thing is I have SO much energy. I'm not hungry and I am not tired. One of the many benefits of eating healthier and loosing weight. Last night Serg and Alexis went to eat chinese food and run to the store to get milk and eggs as we were out. I eat eggs for breakfast almost every morning so he had no choice but to go, and then no milk? Not at this house. We drink like 2 gallons of milk every 3-4 days - if it lasts that long. So my workouts are still cleaning and running around. Still have not gotten around to "work out" per say. I will NEED to watch and do my DVD tonight cause tomorrow is church.
Ok so next topic is CLOVIS, Ca. We have been thinking about moving since I spoke to Serg about the possibility of moving there. I think I sold him on it and we have been praying hard that it be God's will that we move there. It makes sense. Closer to my parents, pretty close to here in Long Beach so we can visit the few friends we have left and Cindy basically. Sergio said there is also a highway that we can take that takes us straight to his mom's in Arizona so it's a good thing there as well. We are so excited about it that we ACTUALLY called a lender to try and get pre-qualified. I think our credit is horrendous, Serg thinks it's not that bad. So we called the guy that does our taxes, he has his own company and he also does loans, my hubby knows him from when he was growing up. He ran our credit and we are scheduled to meet with him at 4pm today. The worst case scenario is that we have to pay all the cruddy stuff on our credit to try and get our credit score up and we are somehow going to have to do that.
So I am kinda scared of what this guy has to say. People think pretty low of people with bad credit and it sucks because I have never had good credit. Even when I had NO credit I could not get anything. It kinda sucks because I am not sure who people GET good credit. I could not get one single credit card because I had no credit. So anyway, I have always had high interest rate credit cards because those are the only ones I qualified for. Sucks because I put myself in a position where I could not pay them anymore and so they went to collections. This was about 7 years ago almost so I am hoping that since they are old we can do something.
I have millions of things going on in my head. Will my job let me work from home if I relocate? Will we be able to even get a loan? How much work does the union have for my husband? Will it be too hot? Too cold? How will it be trying to find a new church? Should we join an independent bapt*tist chu*rch again since I would like to wear pants? Are we going to move away from the Lord if we move or will we get closer to Him? Incorporating bible reading into our nightlroutine? Will be even be able to afford the mortgage? Sergio wants to breed dogs, how will that be? Planning meals, loosing weight. Checking in with my mom? Will they move there too someday? HMMMMMM.......I am feeling a little nutty right now. The kids are taking naps so I am going to check out more info on Clovis on the net. God Bless and if someone if reading this. PLEASE PRAY FOR US!
I am having a hard time incorporating exercise into my daily routine. If you saw me all the things I had to do on a daily basis you would scratch your head and wonder HOW I was even thinking of adding exercise. I have my days down a little more and I stress a lot less than I used to. I wash clothes every other day and I don't stress out too much if I don't vaccum the house every single day. Anyway, I mentioned that I had bought a workout DVD but I haven't even watched it yet. Maybe tomorrow as today I did the laundry. I weighed myself this morning and I was down to 232.6 so I am down about 4 pounds. I started to do Lindora as well because I so suck at stoping myself the day after my "free day". Like Saturday was my free day and I ate chocolate, cookies, pizza and fried chicken on Sunday. I was supposed to be back on track on Sunday but since the patch kids performed and we had a pizza party for them, I just ate a slice and had a chicken breast I drank soda and all sorts of stuff.
The thing that sucks about Lindora are the killer protein days. They are a little hard for me. Then you have to do them once a week and those are even harder. This Friday is our church Christmas Party and we are going to...yep...a buffet. BUT the good thing about the buffet is that they have salads, grilled fish and all sorts of good options. The problem is that I want to eat that super soft yummy buttery bread and all the other bad stuff they have. I will try my darnest to get into ketosis by Thursday so that I am good on Friday. We have a Christmas lights activity afterwards too so it will be nice to be kid free. I have diapers and formula coming out my ears nowadays. I love my baby and everything but I can't wait to be free of bottle again. I can't wait to be back down to 200 pounds.....better yet....170-175 sounds much better. I will just be happy to be back at where I was at last year. I felt so good last year. I was the thinnest I had been in a long time. Anyway, I have lots of clothes that I can fit into if I loose more weight so I am keeping those in mind.
Let me see what else??? I still don't have my books from Amazon. Suprised they are taking so long. I am super broke right now, disability is finally sending me a check after a whole month. The good thing about that is that I get a few thousand dollars from back pay. Now I need to send in the Family leave paperwork so I can get cheddar from them.
My friend Jen called me today. I met her while working for John at Pinto and Assoc. way back when. She's always kept in touch and I am glad she did. I so don't keep in touch with people. She's buying her third house in Clovis, CA. This is a brand new home, totally customized for $420K. She's going to nursing school and for the most part has not worked while raising her 3 girls. Her husband brings home the bacon let's just say that. I would LOVE to be in that situation but I am not and I hope that I am not coveting. I know that pastor talks about that. I think God knows that that's what I want for my girls. A bigger house for them to move around in. This house is way too small for us. I was talking to Sergio about possibly moving to closer. It seems like a win win situation. I would like to be much closer to my parents but San Jose is WAY too expensive and any other place around Long Beach that is affordable like Clovis is San Bernardino which would be moving farther away. If we were to move to Clovis, I would be 2 hours from San Jose, and 3 hours from here. Totally driveable! Now......we just need God's blessing. Without His blessing I don't want to go anywhere. I am going to keep praying and am going to ask my family to keep praying for His blessing. I feel that this would be a good move for us. We will see what happens. OKAY. gotta go, Serg is handling the kids while I finish my post and I still have to go on fitday and write in the foods I ate. God bless.
It's been over a month since I last wrote in here. It's hard finding time to come on here and type the things that are really on my mind with a two year old and a two month old, that and doing all the wife and mom duties. It is a full time job I tell ya. I debated not going back to work but realisticly that can't happen. If my job does not let me continue to work from home I may need to look for a job closer to home. It's not going to be worth me communing and all the money spent on gas. It sucks because I LOVE my job but I have a feeling that the answer will be no. All the corporate people get a fast OK when they decide to move elsewhere but a little peon like me will get a fast NOPE! Anyway we will see. I have to keep praying about getting the guts to actually sit down with my boss and talk to her about it.
Now, my title of this post is starting over with support. What that means is that while on Thanksgiving "break" we went to my moms house and spend quality time with my family. I am sure they were glad to see us but also great to see us gone from their house. I am sure it was hard to have an additional 5 people at their house for 1 whole week. I wish we lived out there. I have to keep praying about that too. Right now I am not sure that is what God wants us to do. Ok so back to the title, my sister Nancy wants/needs to loose weight for health reasons and for job reasons. She's trying to become a correctional officer. They have to go trough this rigorous excercise thing and she needs to be in better shape to pass this test. She's tesing in 6 weeks and needs to get her but in gear pronto. Anyway I just got off the phone with her and I always forget to ask/tell her a bunch of stuff. I have been calling her everyday since we left so I feel like she's a little tired of me ;-) Well she wants to loose weight with me and I am going to try and help her achieve that goal since I pretty much know the ins and outs of loosing weight. I have been working out at home this week, cleaning super extra vaccuming, doing laundry and just running around. My starting weight on Monday was 236...yikes....I was shocked...well sorta. I was eating like 2 candybars a day and chips and all sorts of junk. 3 days later I am at 234.8 and that's after eating breakfast and a cup of coffee. So I think I have lost 2 pounds already. I know I will loose the first 15 pounds or so pretty easily because of all that salty food I was eating. I bought a workout DVD and a jornal to document my foods but have not used them yet. I also ordered two books on Ama*zon on Tuesday and expect to get them tomorrow or so. They are two cookbooks and one of them is for my sister to help her prepare meals. She said she's not much of a cook but weight loss comes with a price and I am hopeful that she will realize that she can't BUY everything made. It is possible to loose weight now a days because there are SO many programs out there like South Beach, Weight Watchers, Jenny Craig, Lean Cuisine but if you are going to maintain the weight she'll need to learn how to cook to keep herself slimmer.
Ok enough of that the kids are both asleep and that's the only reason I was able to even come on here. I need to update the tickers on my site so I must go! Until tomorrow....I am starting to keep track of my foods as well. See my sidebar.
Ahhh...I finally made it here to post. Sheesh it's been long enough. Ok so I had the baby and he was 9 pounds 12 oz. Can't believe it. He's 3 weeks old already and I am still hurting. I had lots of stitches. I didn't ask how many but I can feel I had quite a bit. My recovery got postponed as I had to have a D & C due to some placenta being left behind and some blood clots. Yuk I know. I had to have several internal exams and ultrasounds down there as well and I think one of my stitches actually came out which I am not sure what I am supposed to do. Call them and get them to restitch it? I guess I will need to find out sometime soon.
Ok so my birth story will have to be short and sweet since I had started to post one and my mother in law which is visiting from Arizona lost her truck keys and had me calling all sorts of very rude locksmiths that answer their BUSINESS line like this "HELLO"? and you're left wondering "Is this a locksmith", their reply is "YAH". Ok how the heck do they do any business. Anyway, she found them under the cushion (where she said she had already checked) 2 hours later.
OK now the birth story for real:
I went to my Dr's appointment on 9/21 after I worked for a few hours (from home) and told my boss I would be back to work more hours. When I got there my weight was up 4.4 pounds, I was swollen as a balloon, protein in my urine was 3+ and my blood pressure was crazy high. So Dr said "Go to Labor and Delivery cause you are having the baby today". He gave me the option of stripping my membranes but since I was going to have the baby anyway I figured there was no point. We had Alani with us so we had to make arrangements to get her taken care of and Sergio had to drop me off in L&D to get situated while he went to pick up Alexis and Lauren from school early. So he took them home, left Alani with them and Cynthia took over her when she got there. Sergio got my bags and called everyone from home and on the way back to the hospital to join me. I had to call him to make him hurry because when the burse practioner checked me I was already 4 cm!!! No wonder I could not sleep ALL night. Sergio thought I had not slept because I was anxious about the Dr. appointment but I was truly uncomfortable to the point of tears. Anyway, I was moved to my actual labor room and walking to the room the whole thing felt surreal. When I had Alani I was pretty out of it and it took a long time to get to 4cm. The NP told me what the plan was for my birth. It was 12pm when I went in and she would pop my bag of water at 3pm. If that did not get my contractions going they would add pitocin. At 5:00pm they checked me again and I was about 5cm but not moving fast enough so I was given pitocin. At about 5:45 when the contractions started to hurt more (not to the point of screaming) but they hurt, I asked for the Epidural and I am glad I did, while I waited they started to hurt more and more. I can't remember the times that well but I think it was at about 7:30 that they checked me and I was at 6cm. Sergio and I estimated that the baby would be here by 8:30 and 9:00pm. At 8:00pm I was 9 1/2 but still had the "lip" and so they checked me again at 8:15 and I was ready to go! The Dr. said "ok everyone let's get ready to delivery" I was SOOO excited. You don't believe this day will ever be here! So I start to push when they tell me to and 4 pushes later, the dr is struggling to get him out and I am thinking "Why are you twisting and turning so much" so he tells me "SMALL push" I do so and he says "WAIT" and then "OK GO FOR IT, BIG PUSH" I do and out comes this HUGE child. I can FEEL the fat on his back and arms and I am thinking, "This kid is fat". So they weigh him and they shock me by saying "9 pounds 12 ounces" I think in my head, that's #1 almost 10 pounds and #2 that's MORE than Alexis". He was also longer than any of my kids.
THe poor thing as totally bruised though. His face was totally purple and his nose was DARK purple. His first pictures I look crazy. I didn't even order hospital pictures because they would of come out ugly. He was beat up from the birth canal since he was so big. Sergio was totally happy. I am so glad that he arrived into this world healthy.
I will be back later to post more info about what' been going on in my life. Right now, Alani is up to no good so I have to go. God bless.
I ran out of titles and since I have been posting often and really have nothing to talk about except to keep complaining :-).
Last night I slept pretty good. I mean it still sucked that I got up 5 or 6 times to go to the bathroom, but I kept coming back to bed and falling asleep. I of course kept dreaming about having the baby all night. I am flippen traumatized. I can walk a little better today but it still takes me like 3 or 4 minutes to actually get to walking a little normally (I walk as if I had poop in my underwear - yeah nice visual). I try my darnest not to walk like that in public but ya know sometimes you just don't have control.
I actually went to the Dodgers game with my hubby, Alani, Alexis and Lauren. Serg was SO lucky and was able to park RIGHT BY the entrance door. THAT right there is luck cause I would of NOT made it walking. I would of had to stop 4 or 5 times. Our seats were very close to the entrance as well so God was with me this whole time. I went because I wanted to walk. But I didn't do much walking. Not that I would of been able to handle it anyway.
Today I feel like crap. My neck hurts from sleeping on two pillows, I feel as if I am going to throw up right now. I had a nectarine and still don't feel better, so out of deperation I had some Peanut M&M's, still no feeling better. Isn't chocolate supposed to make you feel better? Maybe I just need to have lunch now. It is about lunchtime. Baby has hiccups again. Seems like he's had tons of hiccups everyday.
I thought I was in labor yesterday cause of that insane pain I had and I had sharp pains "down there". I had read somewhere that that was sign of labor. I guess not for me cause I am STILL here. Ok well that's it I guess. God Bless.
So today I am finally 38 weeks. I have a Dr's appointment on Thursday and he is going to strip my membranes. I got about 2 hours of sleep last night - totally in like 20 minute incraments of course. Contractions kept waking me up and for a quick second, I thought "maybe this is it". I told myself, well if it's the real deal I will know cause "real" contractions hurt like nobody's business and I WILL KNOW. Anyway, I actually had a bit of a breakdown yesterday. I was feeling a little extra crappy, so I jumped in the shower to relax, then decided I was going to make myself take a nap. Naps always help right? Well they seem to make me wake up in a worst mood at times (most of the time). It was warmer than usual yesterday and I can feel my body super hot on my bed, but it takes me like 5 minutes and a lot of pain later to flip over to my left or right, so I finally did, and I felt a bad headache coming on and I thought great!! My hubby was doing laundry this whole time but I am not sure how long I was actually asleep. Anyway, I woke up, went to the bathroom and just started to cry! I could not help it. I knew it was NOT going to help me have this baby, but I just feel so miserable. I needed to just let it out.
So I come out of my room and go to the kitchen and my hubby comes in from the laundry room and he looks at me and instantly knows something is wrong. He gives me a hug and I can't hold back my tears. He SEES how miserable I am. I mean, the itching is BAD, my carpel tunnel is now pretty bad in both hands, I get contractions all day long with nothing to show for, I can't get comfortable ANYWHERE, I can't walk, I can't sleep. It's bad and he knows it. I tell him I am sorry and that I don't mean to be a crybaby but it's all too much for me right now.
I was praying hard, "God please the birth of this baby is up to you, it IS your will, but please let your will be SOON!!!!". Okay enough. My babysitter is getting induced tonight, or tomorrow I should say cause she goes in at midnight tonight. Her original due date was 9/24. I wish my Dr. would just induce me on Friday already. Darn it. So her daughter will most likely be born on 9/19. Lucky her! She has an end is sight. I bet she's gonna have a GREAT DAY TODAY!! I would be happy as a clam if I was her. Fun to know that today is the last day you can tiddy up and prepare as much as possible to get ready to have a baby. Sigh. My time is coming soon. The most I will be pregnant is 1 1/2 more weeks which makes that 9 days. That's not long to a regular non pregnant person that prances around like nothing. I will be that person SOON ENOUGH!
Ok I am officially a little looney. Maybe this experience will get me going on my weight loss once I have the baby. I will have control over my body again after almost a YEAR!!!! Can you believe that....a whole year of carrying something in your belly and being an emotional fricken wreck. Wowzers...well I will stop...God Bless.
I dunno why it won't add the photo to my post from yesterday. Trying again now...
Man I was just looking at my picture for this blog and my face looks so thin. Can't wait to start my weight loss again. Sigh...soon..but as always not soon enough. I added the photo above which was a photo from 36 weeks 3 days. 1 week ago and seriosly, my stomach IS bigger. I inverted the colors so I would not torture you with a view of my stretch marks and my bra. Not sure why I took the pic that way. Anyway, it doesn't look so much like a bra with the colors like that. Anyway....that's me NOW....
Dr's appointment went like this - Baby is fine, vitals are good, blood pressure was a little high when I got there but they took it again and it was acceptable. No weight gain (can you believe it). I am sure I hit my max weight anyway. So the nurse tells me to undress from the waist down cause the Dr. was supposed to do some procedure but I am sure she is talking about the GBS test he did already. I did anyway, but he came in and said "oh I'm sorry she didn't know we had already done it". Tells me my protein test was up but that he STILL did not want to strip my membranes because I am not 38 1/2 weeks YET and moms with diabetes, he'll only induce or do that IF the baby was still in danger but baby is ok now. He wants to wait till next week IF I have not had the baby by then. He measured him and his head measures on target 37 weeks 4 days (1 day over), his waist 39 weeks 5 days I think, and his femer bone 38 weeks 2 days or something. Weight, 7 pounds 14 ounces, probably more like 8 pounds (by 2 ounces). Sheesh and I still have 2 more weeks - REALISTICALLY. Do I think this baby is going to reach 9 pounds. Yep I sure do think so. Darn it. Either my episiotomy is going to be much bigger this time or I am gonna end up with a c-section. Darn it. I am going to try my darnest to get him out naturally. I am gonna keep praying that he comes next week. Maybe he will come the same day or next day after the Dr. strips my membranes. I think Alani was born 4 or 5 days after he did that. My water was leaking like feels like I am now though. I *HOPE it is and the darn bag pops already and he comes. I am flippen tired, super cranky and in pain which I think I have mentioned in every post for like 2 months.
I was having a good day, then my day took a turn when I got home. I just got in a bad mood once these fricken contractions kicked in. I keep thinking the stupid things are doing something cause THEY HURT but here I am *STILL....no baby. Anyway I am being such a big whinny baby. My numb fingers and swollen left hand, carpel tunnel. Yep just what I needed. So I went to the orthopedic or SOMETHING dept. and they measured my hand and gave me those hand braces which are annoying to wear and it's hard to type, but they do seem to help with the pain.
Ok well today is church and I am not going again, abdominal pain, hurts to walk and it's just too much for me for people to be asking me "How much longer"? I can't handle that right now. I need to be alone lounging around at home. Seems like I need a nap or something too. Um...I think that's it. God Bless...
I have been up since 2am today with aches, pains, itching, numb fingers, swoleen left hand, cramping back pain and abdominal pain. Let's see what else....oh and neck pain from sleeping all funky weird when I do sleep. I am surprised I have not bawled out. I think it's because I know it will not help. You know what I have been doing? I serve myself some cereal. That's been my comfort. Not that high in sugar so no worries there but still not 100% good for me. My stomach has been super hard this morning, baby moved earlier today a bunch of times so he's all good. Tomorrow is my Dr's appointment and the closer it gets, the more I am thinking he's not going to strip my membranes. I figure I will be 37 weeks 3 days and he'll think he won't do it till my next weeks appointment since they are weekly. Like I said earlier I think the ONLY way this kid will be on his way out is if he's measuring big but I think the Doc will be willing to let me suffer another week. Crap.
Anyway,every day that passes feels like another week. I am tired and my energy burst has come and gone. Now I am just in constant pain and don't want to do anything. I did all my nesting things. Sure the closet needs to be reorganized cause it is driving me crazy. Sergio supposedly reorganized it but to tell you the truth he made it oh so much worse. Maybe if I am not in so much pain I will just handle it later. The problem is I can't bend down much so I might recruit him for help. He's got a few projects of his own lined up (by me of course) like finish painting up the patch up work he did on my room, the kids room and the living room. There are a few other things to do as well that I just don't remember or care to mention much cause I am in a bad mood. Be back tomorrow to report on my Dr.'s appt. God bless.
And now I want to be 38 weeks...I knew it. Gosh I can't believe I am almost at the end of the road. You loose sight of that with all the aches and pains of pregnancy. You really really do. Seeing women post on the pregnancy boards and it reads "21 week 2 days" in their siggy, makes me want to scream. I could not imagine myself being there right now. I am sure when that was me women at the stage I am at now felt the same.
So baby is good, I think, he's been sorta lethargic all night and this morning. I got up a million times with my weak bladder and all. I am going to get some ice water in a minute and see if he gets his lazy butt up. He was up high all night and was giving me a charlie-horse-type pain in my right side abdomen. I think I actually let out a scream (not a screaching scream) but an uncontrollable "OWWW this flippen hurts scream"!!! Everytime I get up from bed, I think "is my water going to break"? But it doesn't. I keep looking at my undies for leaking amniotic fluid which is what I had with Alani. That Sunday with her, I kept changing my underwear because I though I kept peeing on myself, but it didn't smell like pee! I knew it wasn't it was just too much. So anyway, no dice this time (not yet anyway). This kid seems to be comfy. I have another NST appt. today and I pray that they see these SO VERY PAINFUL contractions or pains I have been having ALL WEEKEND long. But I pray that he is not in distress as well. I mean it hurt to do anything, walk anywhere. I managed to go for a walk because it really felt like my labor had started and I said, let me help this kid get out. Well both times (Saturday's walk to Stearns Park and Sunday's walk around two blocks with Alani) proved to be quite the challenge. Yesterday especially. I had to go down one sidewalk and get on another and I could BARELY manage to pull up my leg enough to get on the curb. I had such a bad contraction and I felt like "ok THIS has GOT to be it" but I walked a little more (so I could get home) and managed to shake that one off. I was in pain though and could barely bend down enough to unstrap Alani from her little buggy car. She wanted to stay outside but there was no way, I needed to sit down and drink some water. So I said "come on you want juice"?? She is a total juice girl. That's probably why she gets diarrhea all the time. Her and her juice. Or I get her in the house by saying "come on you don't want to watch Veggi*e T*ales"? Almost always works. Well thank God it worked. Serg and Alexis were at church. I was going to go, but Serg knew by all the pain I was in that there was no way I was going to get dressed and out of the house like that. Everyone is just WAITING.....
My mom called me yesterday (left me message) and asked me what was happening. She thinks it will be any minute now, and it might be, but I don't think it's gonna happen till the Dr. strips my membranes which I don't even know if he will do it at this Thursday's appt. even though I will be 37 weeks 3 days. I think he is going to make me wait until next weeks appt. which SUCKS...I am gonna beg though. He's going to review my NST tests, I will tell him about my STILL itching, bad painful contractions, the swelling in my left hand where I can BARELY make a fist, the 24-7 numbness in my two left middle fingers, my BIG belly. I think the only thing that will convince him is the size of the baby. He was measuring 2 weeks ahead last time and I can guarantee you my belly is the size of a woman that is 40+ weeks pregnant! It's HUMOUNGOUS. Seriously. I don't sleep very well at all. As a matter of fact, I slept propped up, like sitting up literally, on my bed last night because I kept getting too many pains from the baby's weight. But you know.....OB's get crying women begging them to take the baby out when they darn well know the baby is not ready so I really think they are prepared to shoot you down easily. They don't really care about the tears and all your drama stories about not being able to sleep. I know in their head they think "well use birth control next time woman if ya don't want to be suffering like this". Anyway, that's just the way I think it goes down in their brain.
Alright, well we will see what happens. I am sure I will be back to complain some more some time this week. Ta ta and God Bless.
I could not think of a title. My brain is mush what can I say? I was just about to type on here how it's 6:15am, and my contractions seemed to have gone away. But I feel them now, back cramps and all, not as bad but they are there. I have been awake since almost 4:45 or so when my husband woke up to head off to school. It's his last day of school THANK GOD! But he has to go to flippen Ontario to a job site as part of his assighnment. Ontario is like a million miles away from here...ok not a million but at least 50 to 60 and ON A FRIDAY, and when your wife is "officially" in her 9th month of pregnancy. I have really milked that which is funny. I always tell my husband when he won't do something for me "Your wife is 9 months pregnant, probably carrying a 9 pound baby...blah blah blah". I say it kidding around but deep down inside he knows I am rubbing it in. I keep trying to make him let me poke him with one of my SMALL insulin needles but he's like "NO WAY EVER ARE YOU GOING TO TOUCH ME WITH THAT" and I say "and I have to poke myself 5 times a day, 3 times with the BIG needle and you can't poke yourself ONCE ever!!???". I like to tease him, I know he won't do it. I tell him that because he likes to say he's going to have more kids. It's like "HELLO, do you see what I have to go through to pop these kids out". No joke. Even people from church who like to have tons of kids, are like "wow you really got to think about having more kids huh". In reality, it sucks what I have to go through and having been to the Dr. approx. 30 times or so during pregnancy (not counting NST appointments which are 2X a week for 4 weeks), it's not THAT troublesome. I think I am just used to it. But it's weird to hear "healthy" pregnant women say they have gone to their Dr. 5 or 6 times MAX. That is just so surreal to me. Only 5 times?? Really?
I woke up with a headache and have this strange pain on my right side abdomen, like a pinched nerve type. It's kinda hard to walk. I am dreading the effects of adding that 2nd Lebatalol pill for my high blood pressure. Makes me SOOOO sleepy and gives me the worst headaches ever. I was supposed to go into work today but that's a no no according to the Doc. I need to be monitored and get the OK for Monday. I was actually looking forward to going in to work today but oh well. I need to get my paperwork filled out and I really want to teach someone about my sites. I am keeping good notes for them though so I may just go over how to do stuff over the phone JUST IN CASE.
Well I guess that's it. I don't have anything planned for the weekend, probably just lounge around and try to get some walking done, not that I am not in so much pain that I can barely get around, but walking after 5 minutes seems to be ok. I have to be continually walking though, with back pain and all, but it seems to help and make me feel better. So we will see. Alrighty God bless.
Yesterday I was just SOOOOOO overwhelmed. It was a good day then it turned bad really quick. It was Alexis first day of school so I had to help her prepare for it and take her to school. That was all fine and dandy. I came home and when I went to the bathroom and I wiped it looks like I am starting to loose my plug! I was like "what the heck"?? But excited! I kinda panicked also because I start to feel these sorta painful contractions, like menstrual cramp like and some are sharp. I tried timing them but they are very irregular. So I figure, he's just making his way out and I am sure I will know when things are happening. I hope that I am at least dialating so when I see Dr. Marshall next Thursday he will induce?? Not sure. He's not very open to inducing, I think especially when you have high blood pressure. Anyway we will see..
So I take my break and go and pick up Alexis as they had half day their first day of school. As I circle the packed parking lot a few times looking for her, I am having contractions and I'm uncomfortable, but I am still ok ya know, anyway, long story short, I backed into some young guys car as I tried to make way for someone to come through and he was also coming out of his parking space. I was SO upset. None of this would of happened if Alexis would of come straight to the car like she was supposed to. One of the teachers stopped her because she asked her for help in moving the stupid cones. I mean, they should of been more organized and I can sit here and blame everyone and their mom but really, it was my fault. I felt crappy, the parking lot situation was bad, I should of been more careful. I tell ya this was THE WORST week for Sergio to have to go to Carpenters school. He had already missed two class courses (1 week each) so this one was mandatory. But with me getting closer to having this baby, the things that I have been going through recently medically with this pregnancy, then now loosing my plug and the contractions kicking in like they have been, I am classifying it as the WORST week for him not being here with me. He could of taken care of all this taking and picking up crap. UGH. Oh well...things can't always be perfect can they?
Let's see, I called Dr. Marshall on my way to the school to find out lab results for my itching, they were in and the nurse said she would have him call me. He did call me back but I didn't hear my cell phone ring and he just left me a message saying he was sorry he missed me. He didn't say anything about calling in a prescription so I think my test results came back negative. The thing that concerns me is WHY AM I ITCHING???!!!! Last night was BAD....I didn't get very much sleep, between bathroom breaks, going to the couch and my bed, contractions, and itching, sleep last night was not really sleep. I am really tired today and I have a slew of things to do.
I have my second NST appt. today at 11am which really cuts into my work day. I am going to go in tomorrow (to work) so I need to get as much rest as possible today so I can actually get up at 3am tomorrow. I debated going in because of the contractions but I was just reminded by Human Resourses that I have not completed my Leave of Absense forms. It seems like the baby is taking forever so I have been focusing on that and not the details of actually being OFF work. That will be nice. No work for a few months. Anyway, I need to take care of that and also turn in my DSL and phone bills so I can get reimbursed. I also need to show someone at work how to do some of these inclusion and exlusion files for some of my MLS's. So now I hope that the baby does not make an appearance till I can take care of this stuff.
So we will see where these contractions are really are at at the NST appt. I am sure they will barely register even though they hurt! Ok I will update later. ;-) God bless.
So the appointment kinda sucked this time only because Dr. Marshall had just gotten back from vacation and Veronica my nurse wasn't there this time so everything was a little unorgarnized. Anyway, I was SO swollen when I got there I showed and 8 pound weight gain. That's right. Dr. was not worried as 6 of those pounds were surely water weight. We talked about my visit to Labor & Delivery, he said my blood results came back negative for HELLP BUT they didn't order the 1 blood test they needed to order for some other syndrome that gives you the itchies. He ordered and sound almost certain that I had it. I told him it was extremely uncomfortable and I felt like I was going nuts. Unfortunately the test takes 4-5 days to come in (the results)....so now I wait. Sucks because yesterday was a holiday and the weekend and holidays don't count. I am sure I won't get a call until Monday and I don't know how I am going to take this itching!!!! It's HORRENDOUS. He suggested I get the Aveeno Oatmeal bath to get some relief. I did and it didn't help. It made my skin feel nice and soft but that's about it. I even took a Benadryl last night and it helped me fall asleep till 1am then forget it I was up once it wore off......been itchy ever since. SO SUCKS. Baby was good, he didn't measure him and didn't check for dilation or effacement as he was running like an hour behind schedule. He had even forgotten about the GBS test, so I mentioned it and he said "let's do it" so we did, we'll see how that comes out. I don't have another appointment till the 14th which is NEXT Thursday....I started NST testing yesterday and baby was fine. I didn't feel any contractions until she started to unhook me from the machine.
Last night 2 really painful contractions woke me up and I prayed that they would be consistent and they would stop me in my tracks but no such luck. So at the next appointment I will be almost 38 weeks and I am super praying I don't make it but if I do I hope he strips my membranes and that will get things going. I was +1 in protein in my urine so I did the 24 hour Protein urine test on Sunday and took it to the lab yesterday. We'll see what the turns out. My blood pressure was high when I got there so I had to lay down for like 20 minutes and she took it twice till it went down to 130. He said I am showing signs of pre-eclampsia.....so maybe he will induce me??? Man I am so desperate right now.....I would almost do anything. Serg is in school this week though so maybe I just need to hang tight this week, work on walking a lot and finish washing baby clothes.
My parents were here this weekend and my sister was too. It was nice having my family around again. I tell ya though it's exausting. My house is small so all the people in my house is crazy. Once they left, that's when we left to the lab to drop off my urine container (nasty) and do blood work then went to NST appt. We grabbed some Taco Bell, came home and I watched CSI miami for a bit on my bed and took a short nap. Woke up with a headache and in a bad mood. Started to clean my house, vacuum, wash dishes etc. Felt nice to sit and relax in a clean house. The rest of the night was ok. We had leftovers galore so we had them for dinner and we went to bed at like 10. Got up early today to start the day and serg went off to school.
I am not sure what I am going to do this week. Alexis starts school on Wednesday but that's the day I need to go into work...so I would need to take Alani to Alma's really early then let her take Alexis to school on her first day?? Not sure about all that. I am not sure what class she will need to go into or any of that. Then Thursday, I have an NST appt at 11am. I might have to just go in on Friday. We will see...I need to think about this. Ok well I rambled long enough. I will update later this week if I get a call from the Dr. on the blood test results. God Bless.
Well yesterday after I got off work I think I got 2 or 3 things done off my list of like 20. In my earlier posts I mentioned how I had these incredible energy bursts. Well I am afraid to say they are going away. My husband was fixing the kids room up, hooking up the stereo, cable and TV and I could not even stand there for longer than 2-3 minutes. He sent me away and made me go sit down. I started to get super itchy again and took a Benadryl. I knew I was not going to get through the night if I didn't. Anyway, I took my millionth shower since I have been feeling hot and itchy all day and I think I fell asleep pretty fast BUT I woke up at 12:00 and went to my couch. I tossed and turned on it for about 40 minutes, got up went to bed, baby decided he wanted to be awake so I lay there awake, then I could hear my hubby snoring and I woke him up so he would stop. STILL no luck falling asleep. It was 2am by now and I was WIDE awake. I went back to the couch, then got up and took another Benadryl as the package says take every 4-6 hours - oh I guess I didn't mention that this whole time I am itching. Head, legs, arms - just everywhere. You know what it feels like? Like ants are crawling on you. It's the flippen worst. I was commanding the baby to come out already. I am D O N E. I might not be 100% ready at home but I am done being pregnant and want him to come already. This sucks! UGH....I noticed that I keep having "wishful" dreams about my water breaking. My mom called last night and said they were coming into town this weekend which is great! It would be so nice if I went into labor while they were here. My sister is also coming with her two boys. She's 29 weeks pregnant I think. So she's coming to hang out with me. My parents are going to a party and I know I'm not going - it's too far from here and with my luck I would go into labor being away. Anyway, I guess that's it. My right arm and hang is totally swollen. It feels and looks like a giant's hand. Seriously. I morphed into something very weird looking...my nose is big, my feet are like a size 12 probably,ONE of my arms is huge......ok I'll stop.... God Bless.
My feet feel like they are going to burst again. I am almost off work and I already have a list of things I need to get done. My husband has been doing a lot. He put my curtains up (I am going to put up some pics tomorrow or Friday once we are done). My bathroom looks good. Matching towels, shower curtain and all other things match. Satisfied with that. My room got rearranged today in such a way so that the things for my third child fits. I can't believe all that is being done in this house to get ready for this baby. I don't think we did half the things we have done so far with Alani. I mean this house is changing from top to bottom. I am tired and all I have done is work today. I just took my last break and jumped in the shower because I am just HOT today and it's probably like 80 degrees tops. I just feel icky now. Contractions are starting to be more painful everytime. Not consistent ones so I am for sure not in labor but they just hurt and I am just hoping they are doing something. Not sure if my Dr. is going to check for effacement or dilation on Friday. I know he's going to test me for GBS and that requires some open leg actions. Hate those. Still so embarrasing. At least when you are in labor you are in pain and you don't care but when it's the dr. that's been taking care of you for 9 months, it's like "ok spread em' lemme take a peek". Anyway, it's gonna get done. I hope he does check for dialation or effacement and tells me I am like 3 cm or something. I don't think I have dropped because I still feel out of breath a lot & I've read that when you drop you feel like you can breathe better. Also, I am still hungry all the time. I eat and like an hour later I am hungry again. I don't give in usually and when I do I have my allowed snack. UGH...my feet....they are swollen and they hurt! I am still itching too, a little less than this morning but still itchy.
Well I guess I just wanted to come and wine for a sec and talk about what's been happening at my house, work wise......alright God Bless...be back to report about my Friday 36 week APPT.
I labeled this post trip #1 to L&D because I think I will end up there again eventually before I actually give birth. I was there this time because I have been itching like nobody's business....like all over...top of my feet, arms, my back, Oh my gosh my back, and Oh my gosh my boobs, neck....just unbelieveable. So I look up "Itching" in my "what to expect when you are expecting" book and it starts talking about HELLP...and all kinds of drama about how my kidneys can shut down and one of the symptoms is itching. So me not wanting to brush this off, call my Dr. because by this time my hubby is breathing down my throat and wants to take me to L&D (at 6am) so I wait for the call, she tells me to go to L&D because my Dr. is on vacation till Wednesday anyway (I have an appt. with him on Friday) and they can do blood work etc...so I get there and stay till 3pm. They monitor "G" (the baby) and he's happy as a clam...I am even having contractions (WOO HOO!!!) so they check me all around, no rash, they order blood to be drawn and if I am deloping this HELLP stuff, they will call me so I can come back ASAP. Otherwise my Dr. will go over the results when I come back to see him on Friday. I never got a call and I am still itching. They told me to take Benadryl which helped a little but I had never taken this stuff before. When I went to go buy it I thought it was like cough syrup looking but ended up they are pills. I took one, fell asleep and woke up with a MEAN headache. I felt like I was hung over. I am totally itching now and am tempted to take another one but I am in the office today (since my hubby is finishing the work at Matt's house) but I still have to drive to Matt's house and I am scared that I am going to be really dizzy. At least he's driving home. I will probably take one when I leave but I am not sure I am going to hang that long. We'll see.
Anyway, I will be 36 weeks soon and I am hoping baby will be here within the next two weeks. I wish I would go into labor NOW but we are not quite ready yet. I washed the baby's bedding, stroller, car seat and some clothes, but not all. I still have to wash all my blinds too!! My husband is putting up these really nice curtains and curtain rods all over the house. We got THE BEST DEAL ever on these rods. I got them on clearance for $4.00 (the rods) instead of $13 (each) and then I got curtains that were between $30-60 for $3-$6. So my entire house will have curtains and we spent about $80 on EVERYTHING. He put my bedroom ones up and man they look nice!! We got a really nice sateen duvet cover as well and it will look so good in there. The kids rooms is coming along - they have new comforters, even back up sateen duvet covers, and really cute matching decorative pillows made of velvet type material. I got Alexis underbed organizer containers for her polly pockets and barbie stuff. I just need to get one couch out of my living room as our "decluttering" process and re-arrange some stuff, like our room, to make room for baby rocking chair and now the basinette (which I also washed with baby soap).....wow tired of typing.
Thank our Lord, He gave us the energy to do all this and go to Sergio's mini family reunion in San Fernando. His aunt & uncle which raised him had a get together and he got to see his cousins which he has not seen since he was like 13. He was the popular one there and they kept telling him how good he looked and how he had a nice family. They looked at him like they were proud of him and he totally looked SO happy and I am so glad. He said he felt wanted when he was there and thanked me for being his wife and giving him his kids (awwww). Anyway, ok just had to document that. God bless.
Wow so I figured I would be more tired than EVER by now, well I have my days, but this week I have been getting these energy bursts out of nowhere. I am still in pain, especially when bending down because I can't really bend down because of my water balloon stomach, but I can actually DO stuff. When I sit down I collapse but then once I rest for 5 minutes I catch myself sweating again getting into another "project". I have been such a freak since getting pregnant. I have been preparing for this baby to come for months. I have cleaned out kitchen cabinets completely, cleaned BEHIND the stove AND microwave cart (which was so totally disgusting by the way). Watching all those shows on TV (me and my hubby) makes ME want to declutter my house. WHen you are done watching them you look at your house and you're like YUK!! We have painted every room in this place now (the kids rooms twice now) except for the kitchen which does need to be painted now cause to me it looks ugly with all the chips in the wood from just wear and tear. The doorframes need to be painted as well. This weekend I am going to call my landlord so he can provide us with paint like he said he was.
Anyway, so Serg did work for this guy from work, which was a blessing because now I can pay a bill I was going to get a little behind on, I was debating whether or not to get behind on it and get the mattresses with that instead but I *think I will be responsible and pay the bill. The beds will have to wait till I get more income coming in. I am supposed to be waking up my husband right now so he can get ready to go to the church to put together the play set he built for my babysitter but he has been working so hard all weeek! He painted the kids room on Monday and moved all the furniture in, then preped, sanded, primered and painted the bathroom. The Wednesday and Thursday he did similar work stuff at my co-workers house, except he actually got paid there. Today and Saturday he is working at church building this huge wood playset thing (not charging the church). On sunday they asked him to work as parking lot security but I really don't want him to because it's the church's 18th anniversary and there is only going to be 1 service and food afterwards and how am I gonna handle everything being so pregnant. How is he gonna eat? So I think I might make him call and say he can't do it cause he has to help me with the kids. I think it's only reasonable, he's already contributing by being there for 2 days. Oh I forgot one thing he did also, when he was dreadly and deadly tired, at my babysitters house, her toilets, tubs and sinks were ALL clogged and he begged him to go out there to fix. We headed straight over there after work and she bought dinner, but he got it done.....so proud of my husband. He's had a crazy life and in the past he has done some things to hurt me. But thank God Jesus died for our sins and through God's Grace we are saved. Saved through the blood of the lamb. For this, I have forgiven him and now my marriage has never been better. With God in our lives, I NEVER in a million years thought it could be this good! Thank you Jesus.
Well I am 34 weeks now...seems like now that I am posting on a weekly basis the weeks are going by even slower. I remember being 12 weeks pregnant and thinking I wish I was 20 weeks, then when I was 23 weeks I wanted to be 30 weeks. You're just never satisfied I guess. This week I told hubby "34 weeks" and he looked dissapointed he said "I thought you were 35 weeks!!!" Yep, he's getting anxious too. I took a sick day yesterday cause I was just not feeling good. Headache to the max, cramps and sore throat. All went away except for the cramps. I know this is TMI but my "down there" hurts ALL the time. I feel like the vains are bruised or strained or something. It hurts when I walk or do ANYTHING for that matter. I am TOTALLY waddling now and I so don't want to. Dawn at church was apparatly walking behind me and said "Bertha you are totally waddling" I said "I know and i don't like it". I feel as if the baby's head is between my legs". I am telling you I did not feel like this with Alani until the last 2 weeks or so. I have 5 more weeks? Seems like a little to alot of people but if you look at me, you're like, geesh, she's not gonna make it. To tell you the truth I am gonna pray SUPER hard for this baby to come at 36 weeks since he will be considered full term. That would be the week of Sept. 4th. A girl can dream no?
Let's see what else is going on. The kids room got painted! It looks nice and serene now. Not a shocking purple/lavendar anymore. It like a very light capuchino. The dressers got delivered this weekend. I am super broke now of course. We bought 3 of them dark wood. We were up till 10:30 PM getting everything in there. I made Sergio bring in the bunk beds from the garage and he assembled them. Now all we need is $250 bucks so I can buy the mattresses from Costco. :-) I am washing baby clothes right after I get off work today and Sergio also got the car seat and boppy pillow out of the garage for washing. We still have tons of things to do so me wishing that the baby comes in 2 weeks better not happen for my sake. Well we might be ready. Not sure...we'll see. It might be better that the baby is born on time as that would mean that I can work till the end of Sept and I would have Oct, Nov and December off for Maternity leave. I would be super broke for Christmas but hey that's ok. We don't need no stinkin' presents. As long as the kids got some, I would be totally cool with that. I am sure we will be totally fine. I am just dramatic when it comes to $$$. My hubby is supposed to do some work for this guy from work so that will bring in some $$. Lately he's been doing a lot of free work for people but God blesses us because of that. He has let me know this week that is so totally there and I thank Him and love Him so much more for that. That's it for now. I have been eating like a total porker this week so I expect to get yelled at by the Dr. on 9/1 which is my next Dr's appt. I will *TRY to be good this week though. GOD BLESS.
Ok so from now on the following day I am going to come on here and post about my appointment with Dr. Marshall so it's documented. You think you are going to remember but ya don't.
MISC: Ok so I was running a little late to the appointment, Nancy, Alexis and Alani came with me. I forgot to remind Sergio to get a stroller out of the garage for me so we had to walk in there with her (which is always dangerous because she grabs everything).
WEIGHT: I gained 2 pounds in two weeks. Scale said I gained 4 pounds but I had just eated AND taken a shower so my hair was wet. Doc said remove 2 pounds. WHEW. Better but still not "acceptable". Sucks. It's that darn Louisiana sausage I have been eating. I bought more of it this weekend when I went grocery shopping but I also decided to get the turkey sausage, I compared the calories and was shocked to see 26 grams of fat on the Hot link sausage to 6 grams of fat for the turkey. WHAT A DIFFERENCE. So needless to say I am laying off the other stuff although it is super delish (but also gives me heartburn).
Blood pressure: Was high like 152 when I got there but that was because we were rushing and I was nervous about weight. SO, she had me lay on my left side for about 5 minutes and it was 118 which was the lowest it's ever been. I didn't tell the dr. that I had JUST taken the meds like 1 hour before I got there. So I need to continue to take it in the AM so when I get there I know if it's worn off by then and need to go back on taking 2 of them.
NEXT APPT: In two weeks, then they will be weekly as I will then be 35 weeks. I think my NST appointments will start either at that time OR at 36 weeks. Can't remember.
and last but NOT least.............
BABY: Turns out that my itty bitty is not so itty bitty anymore, little monster, he's 5 lbs 4 oz now. His head measures that of a 33 week 4 day old, but his waist was measuring at 34 weeks 6 days and worried the doc for a second as babies from mom's with diabetes tend to be fat BUT then he measured his femer bone (sp?) and it also measured that of a 34 week 6 day baby so he said it all worked out. His body proportion measures on target with his waist. So he's most likely going to be a tall boy as he is measuring almost 2 weeks ahead in length and weight. Fatty boy.
I need to dig up Alani's ultrasounds to see what weight she was at at 33 weeks. I am curious now. But I am getting better at my eating I think. OK so I had Ben and Jerry's ice cream the other day and I bought Chips Ahoy cookies that I have been munching on here and there (I need to hide those as they are my weakness, they are so good!) I only have 1 or two (or three when I push it) but still I need to hide them or make everyone else eat them before I eat them all. I need to buy more sugar free cookies but they are just not the same.....sigh....But anyway, I think that that's all the "BAD" stuff I had. Before I get that 2nd peice of wheat toast I think about "G" (the baby) and what it will do to him (fatten him up even more then I have a hard time pushing him out and I have to end up getting a C-Section) and I back off. I think I am going to make me some breakfast now so I can eat some healthy stuff. God Bless and more to come later...
33 weeks today and according to my pregnancy ticker I have 49 days to go. This weekend we are supposed to get the 3 wooden dressers we had ordered from this furniture place in Orange County. Got a really good deal. So on Saturday morning I have to empty all of Alexis drawers and Serg is going to move it to the garage. Someone if supposed to come by Thursday night to buy Alexis furniture. I am selling it for a super good deal. $175 for the whole thing. Queen bed with Mattress, dresser, mirror and two nightstands. I put it on the pennysaver and got alot of calls this weekend. So hopefully these people pay for it on Thursday then they are supposed to pick it up next weekend.
My sister is visiting from San Jose this week. She knows I work from home and basically came to spend time with Alexis. I get off work early so we have plenty of time to do things after I get off work. It's nice to have some family around for once. I get lonely sometimes you know? There's nothing like having your mom or sisters/brothers around. They know you....the real you.
Anyway, let's see....symptoms wise, I am sleeping a little better, instead of getting up every hour on the hour I am actually sleeping 2-3 hours at a time! That's such a huge thing. I have my days where I am just in pain, cramping, can't bend down, out of breath and feeling like I am going to pass out if I don't sit down but I actually think I am getting a little used to it. We went to the mall yesterday (Nancy me and Alexis) while my hubby and Alani stayed home to take a nap. and I think we were there for MAYBE an hour. By the time we went to the last store, Nancy was like you ready to go home. I was like "yeah" she noticed I had to keep sitting down. My back was flippen killing me. Sometimes my days are bad like I said. Yesterday was one of those days. Towards the end of the day I am D O N E. It sucks cause I wish I could be more active so I can do things with my sister, like go bike riding and such. I think I am gonna ask Serg to let's go bike riding tonight. I can walk and they can ride. It will be fun to get out and do that. He doesn't want to because he feels sorry for me I know cause I can't ride a bike anymore. My belly is just too big and I am super clumsy right now so I know I would loose my balance. I can't even put on my clothes (bottoms) without holding on to something, so that kinda tells ya everything. Seems like it's just TOO early to feel like this but from reasing the pregnancy boards "Due in September" EVERYONE seems to be on the same boat. Pain Pain and more pain.
Well I think that's it for now. I will be back later this week as I have a Dr's appt today and my sister gets to see the baby via ultrasound!!!
Man oh man. I woke up feeling like I have a hangover, but there is not that alcohol taste in my mouth or stomach. I didn't sleep very well at all last night AGAIN. Need Unisom. I took my blood pressume meds late last night which I am sure have to do with this horrible neck type headache I have. I even just threw up. I woke up at 5:55 from my couch. I probably sleep for about an hour (if that) on my bed, then I went to the bathroom like 4-5 times AT LEAST, then I just gave up and dragged some pillows to my couch but was not very comfortable at all all night. I got up for the millionth time and took some tylenols because I felt the headached then tried to go to bed and woke up with a very painful pain in my stomach. I knew right away what it was, tylenol with no food in my stomach. Got up and slapped some peanut butter and splenda sugared jelly on 1 piece of wheat toast and had some milk. Felt way better. Sat up on my couch and just stared out my window. Only 1am. Ugh....
I didn't go soul winning last night with my church. It was just too much. We went to the beach though (before soul winning), and I KNEW and Sergio knew I was tired because I had been up since 3am to drive into work. It was either go to the beach and try to sleep there OR stay home with Alani and my hubby take my neice and nephews to the public pool. I knew I would not get any sleep with her here. She gets into EVERYTHING. So I went and I did sleep for a bit but that walk from the car to the actual shore, wore me out. By the time we got home and showered and ready to go, DUDE I was in pain. I kept getting charlie horse type cramps on the sides of my big pregnant belly. I could barely make a move without feeling it. ON top of that all, when I had gotten home, I noticed that my left foot and ankle were swollen. I felt like I had a club foot and my skin felt tight and just yuck. So I was like no way can I go to church.
So I am hoping that I at least make it to 36 weeks SOON cause I want to have this baby already. I am not ready for him, but I just want this to be over already. I know I will miss being pregnant but dang it, this is hard, this kid has seriously beat my body up this time around. I don't think I have woken up feeling crappy THIS many times like ever. So early in pregnancy. People say "Oh you're almost done", UM no I'm not. I am ALMOST 33 weeks but that's not ALMOST there. Yesterday Sergio got home from church and said "Oscar asked me if I was sure we weren't having twins" I told Sergio that I really did not think I was much bigger than Alma. When I went to her babyshower and they did the toilet paper game thing, where you wrap so many block of toilet paper around your belly, well she was 12 squares of TP and I am about 13 1/2. I am 5'10 though so I think that 1 1/2 more blocks of TP for someone 5'10 AND I am a big girl when I am NOT pregnant so I think I may LOOK bigger than her because I don't wear baggy clothes or something. I dunno. I feel better knowing that I am not really THAT much bigger. Her due date is 5 days farther along than me. SO anyway...my head is pounding and Alani is asking for JUICE. Gotta go... God Bless.
Ok here my my whinny baby post....LONG....starting Friday
I called in to work sick on Friday as there was no way possible I was going to be able to drive in to work on like 10 hours of sleep the ENTIRE WEEK. This baby boy of mine is proving to be a challenge already. PLUS, Alexis has had an ear infection since we went to Newport Beach last weekend and it was BAD all week. The little sleep that I was getting, she would wake me up crying. The meds she got on Tuesday for her ears seemed to not be working. Her ear was totally RED and swollen and I could not even lighty touch her ear because she would start crying. I thought she was exaggerating but then I saw that her ear was actually red and swollen. Anyway, more drops, more treatment and we were both all better by Saturday night.
Saturday started with me making breakfast, Sergio went to Pastor's house with Albert to try and finish fixing his bathroom addition. He took my Envoy because his truck is getting worked on at the shop. Albert's dads worker took out the bumber trying to pull out of a parking space. Don't ask my how that can happen but it did. So I wasn't really going to go anywhere anyway, I did laundry, cleaned up the house but this whole time I feel AWFUL, like seriously I felt like I was in labor on Saturday. I had THE WORST cramps, going from the front of my stomach to my back. I had those painful lower back cramps, like when you're about to get an awful period or like the first day of that grosse period. I kept drinking water and tried to keep myself on a positive note. Alma's babyshower was at 1pm and I was supposed to make an entre to bring but there was just NO WAY I was going to cook something, watch Alani AND get ready. So when my husband got home to drive me to the shower, I had barely gotten out of the shower, the gift was not wrapped AND I had no food for the shower. So off he went to the chinese food spot to buy a tray for like 20 people of Chow Mein and Orange Chicken. I asked Cindy his sister to watch Alani as there were no kids allowed and she was all excited because this is the first time ever we leave her alone with her. Hubby was NOT happy about that but oh well what can I do. He wanted to complain more but he knew I felt like absolute crap. I took Alexis with me though. We got there and like 5 or 6 of the ladies had their kids. Some people just don't follow the rules. So we eat, I hear "Oh whoa look at your belly" like a million times (basically look at how big your stomach is).....open presents, I eat cake (that I am not supposed to eat) and I helped clean up (as crappy as I felt since I had to wait for Sergio)...we get home, and I actually start to feel a little better (maybe it was the cake!) just kidding. Cindy decides she wants to keep Alani and to my total and utter shock, my husband is OKAY with it. So we take Alexis to Dave and Busters since we never take the kid anywhere alone, since our almost 2 year old brat, is well, a two year old brat. We eat and have a good time, we come home, get Alani and finish off the night nice and boring watching TLC trading spaces and the episode sucks so I go to bed alone.
Sunday, we wake up late, don't go to AM Sunday school OR church, clean up, I cook, we lounge and I wash more clothes, fold, clean clean and clean. I start to feel like crap AGAIN. We start getting ready for PM church service, our bus kids 5 week ministry turn starts, new verse, new song and new skit. Our assistant pastor and his wife make it known (to me) that we were not there in the AM service. OKAY....I say....they figure I was not feeling well...good guess...so we come home, I am in a not so good mood because I was just tired and hurting and mad that I can't even bend down without being in pain, I start to get dinner together, and instead of my hubby asking me if I need help with anything, he sits in front of the computer and starts looking whatever up. I looked over at him and said "sure honey, you can help me by doing blah blah blah" he got up and was being a big baby and then Alexis said "yeah Dad don't be all sensitive" or something to that effect and that was the end of that. He got totally pissy, I told him not to help me if he was going to have an attitude, it all ended with me saying "well don't eat then, WHATEVER" he marched off, didn't eat dinner" and I was totally fine with it. I was like (in my head) "COME ON I HAVE HAD SUCH A BAD TIME ALL LAST WEEK, THIS WEEKEND, AND I STILL DID ALL THE FLIPPEN CHORES AT HOME, INCLUDING THE LAUNDRY, WHICH IS HIS JOB, I COOKED FOOD FOR LIKE 2 DAYS, I AM COMPLAINING AND IN PAIN THE WHOLE WAY HOME, AND YOU JUST SIT AT THE COMPUTER LIKE YOU ARE THE ONE THAT IS TIRED, WHAT!!! DID I MISS SOMETHING HERE". Yes I am crazy, I said all this in my head and I stuck to my guns. I am just a wicked pregnant woman right now. Don't mess with me. As of this AM he's still mad at me and he slept on the couch. I had the bed all to myself. I am sure he's got a little neck pain going right now. He's really hard headed so I betcha he'll still be mad when he gets home. If he apologizes, I will have to as well, that's IF.......just kidding. If he doesn't make peace I will.... That was God telling me that ya know... God bless
