I am back to being really up and down with my moods. Total mood swings and I HATE it. I feel like such a downer which makes me not want to come on here and talk about it. But then I convince myself to TALK.....Talk to myself at least. Get my feelings out in writting. I am thinking I am like this because of stress. There has been SO many changes in the past 2 weeks! I hate change....good change I like, bad change I cringe at. New boss is starting today and let's just say I know her well and I cannot believe for the life of me that they hired her to be a manager. The #1 reason people leave this place is because of bad management. This person KNOWS how to manipulate people in a way that is totally disgusting. I know her pretty well and knowing all this about her gives me the creeps. This job that she got now, let's just say she fought hard for in a really bad way and has lost her closest friends and is not regreting it at all. I am not one of those friends thank goodness! I saw her in action a few years ago and knew that I had to stay away. Other people didn't listen to me and now feel like she stabbed them in the back with an ax several times.
Anyhow, I worked from home on Friday and it was so nice! When my boss said goodbye on Thursday she walked me out, told me not to be afraid to ask management to allow me to work from home because they would approve it. So in about 1 month when my new "boss" get settled in I am going in for the kill. Gas is seriously crazy high and now that my hubby is not working (for several weeks) it's going to start making a dent in my wallet.
Today I have a Dr's appointment at 1:30 which means I have to leave work early. Then I have a massage sceduled for 4pm. I was going to try and make it to the gym but I guess it all depends on how everything goes.
Well I have not weighed myself which is never good. Wondering when I am going to get my act together again and get to it already.
The RU program starts on Friday and I am feeling the pressure. I felt like my helper took over at this Friday's meeting. She's a really good Cristian but she talks A LOT and so I need to have a talk with her about sticking to the schedule and staying in her role as my helper. I think she thinks she is the leader of the group or something and I just kinda feel bad about having to "reprimand" her about it. You see I have a group of ladies in what is called our "2nd talk" where each of them can open up since we are in smaller groups. I start with opening in prayer & move on with checking everyones booklets. I give them points which are for future awards and I challenge them to memorize scripture to help them during the week. Anyway, in 40 minutes I have to do that AND get around to each lady and ask what problems they encountered this past week and encourage them and give them godly advice. One lady is going through a REALLY REALLY hard time and while we have to be compassionate, some people will want to tell you their life story and use up all 40 minutes. I knew we had to move on to the next lady but my helper kept egging this lady on and by this time she had used up most of the time. I should of taken control of my group and in the end, I didn't get to 2 ladies and one of them was crying (I noticed this as we were getting up to join all the other groups again) and I was upset at myself because I went in the with no confidence and was totally unprepared. All my stuff was messy and disorganized and I had hardly studied during the week. This is so not me! So I got myself together on Saturday but I still need to have a serious talk with Jane about her sticking to her duties of a helper and letting me stick to my leader's schedule. I might call her during the week and ask her to go out with me for coffee so we can discuss a plan of attack. She gave me a really nice card telling me how happy she was that we were working together to help those that are lost.
My husband bought me the cutest leather cover bible this weekend with my name engraved in the front of it. I love it!!! Now I can write all over it if I feel like it. He doesn't like to write in bibles (not sure why)....so I already highlighted, underlined and wrote all over mine :-)
Alright well that's all my boring life things. Till later. God bless.
I haven't really felt like typing out the drama's in my life lately. laziness.....or maybe there just has been too muc of it. Not in my family life....like marriage but everywhere else it seems like. Work and accident stuff. Ugh...but it will all work out in the end.
I went to the chiropracter for the first time since my accident and boy did I need it. I didn't realize how tense I was. I slept like a baby last night and didn't want to get up this morning. It was such instant relief and I was in the bestest of moods after I walked out of there. I felt like I was floating!! Anyway, I have been in a rotten mood lately which is another reason I have not typed out my rants on here. I would of talked about people in a way that I should not be. I kept reminding myself that I was a Christian and I was going to get through my anger issues and I did. I just need to accept some of the things that happen that are out of my control. You know why stress on things that I cannot change. We are human and it happens but sometimes we can make things worse.
My eating habits have sucked of late. Not awful but I have snuck in some junk. I have not been to the gym since my accident either but I am planning on getting back on track on Saturday. I am going to go for a nice workout and for a swim in the heated pool.
I guess that's pretty much it, my boss's last day is today and she is going to work for a new company and working from home. I am thinking about joining her there. I would work from home and get paid more. Hmm...not much to think about heh? Except I am comfortable where I am And just got a raise but I am not sure that the commute is paying off as gas is so expensive right now. We will see what the other job has to offer. Well that's it for now. God bless.
Not the eating but work. First let me start by writing really quick about the accident I got into on Monday. Not my fault (2nd time I got into an accident and it has not been my fault)and it was an off duty cop that hit me. I hate this because even though I was not at fault and I was rear ended pretty hard and we do have some injuries the insurance company started by offering me $150. LOL. WHAT? They so suck. So today at some point I am supposed to send them an e-mail with me request. I want to go to a chiropracter for 3 months and the cost of this PER person is $2200 with some follow up appointment in between. So why did they offer me $150 for treatment for 3 people? Because they take advantage of people. I am not getting a lawyer YET but if they decide they want to mess with me I will. So anyway....the other bad news is my boss is quitting and NOBODY KNOWS so Florence if you read this SHHHHH the person that "leaked" this info is the only one that knows so if it got around she would be fired. Anyway this girl that is the most ANNOYING person EVER that HATES working here and even quit for a week to work somewhere else was given preference to interview for her job and is DEMANDING almost 6 figures for her position. WHAT!? Ok my boss compliments me on a daily basis on the GREAT WONDERFUL FANTASTIC work that I do here and I am not even given an opportunity to interview. I am so "upset". Ok I am being bitter and I am praying about it. I just needed to vent. Supposedly I was being considered for a promotion but I have not heard a peep about this promotion since it was mentioned. I am thinking I am going to have to transfer to another department OR just get a job closer to home.
Another thing I was considering, since my boss is leaving and all, ask her about me working from home. Maybe she will approve it before she leaves and all will be well. But it's more like a "yeah right" but let me give it a shot anyway. I will do this today and see how it goes. Pray for me if there is anyone out there that reads my blog and actually believes that prayer does work. If the favor does not sway my way, then I know it is nto God's will and I will need to accept it and do what I have to do. God bless.
This is a side view of my church. It's going to look much different soon!
Well day 28 of 28 was yesterday and I guess you can say I went out with a bang. I got down to 227.8 but I am sure I gained a bit over the weekend. I had like 3 cookies on Saturday...just because they were there. We were at the RU training and I just felt like being a pig even though I wasn't hungry. So here I am today and my stomach is trippen. Making weird noises it hasn't made in a while. Hopefully I will be able to get it back to normal after my.....I don't want to say it....3 protein days. Ugh. I dred these days but after I am done (as hard as they are) I feel better. I don't feel very hungry during the day, it's the evening that I find difficult.
So it looks like I am going to HAVE to work out less at the gym. I just CANNOT afford the time that I am spending there. I am letting other things go in order to be there 2 hours a day and it's not paying off well. I took Friday off work just to get house things done like grocery shopping, washing my car, paying bills & spend time with Alexis before she went back to school...and more!! So I am going to start doing the Body For Life WORKOUTS, not the diet but the workouts because they are intensive and require about an hour on days where you work out with weights and 20 minutes on Cardio Days. The cardio is super intensive though and I am for sure going to use the stairmaster for this workout. Well I will change it up but that stairmaster kicks my butt. I also want to buy some sort of protein powder drink. I think Costco carries a good one that's only like $15. These will work perfect on my protein days as sometimes I just feel like drinking something and not having to actually eat meat as protein will be nice. So I might run over to Costco on my lunch to get a bag. I need to make sure the nutritional info on the label is....well...nutritious.
RU went well again on Friday night. I heard A LOT of preaching about the importance of Soul Winning. As a leader in the RU ministry, I have to go back to Soul Winning. I know the Lord wants me to and it's not a good example if I don't. I can't use my work as an excuse anymore. The Lord will help me get up and get through my days. I just have to start trusting in Him again when it comes to this. So now it looks like we will be at church Wed as well.
The good thing is our kids have all their friends there. Alexis goes to school there and can't wait to meet up with her friends. She works in the nursery too which is good. Alani is in the nursery and all her little friends are in there too. She knows the routine. She likes to take her own purse which is the funniest thing. I need to take a picture of us leaving for church. I have a beautiful family and I thank God to the fullest. God bless.
I woke up in a VERY bad mood then the mood got worst when I got on the scale. A 1 pound gain. WHAT?!?? Stupid scale. Oh well I just have to keep on moving along. What else can I do. I can't explain the gain so I am not going to worry much about it.
Last night Serg went to the gym with me! His mom was in town and Alexis left with her to visit some relatives. I called the gym and made arrangements for the babysitting dept. to watch Alani and Gabriel but I ended up leaving Alani with my 13 year old neice Angie. So we worked out and it was nice to have him there so he can see what I do when I leave the house. Hard work to loose this weight.
Not much else going on. I think I might take the day off tomorrow. I have so many things to do and I am so tired that I think I might just do that (if my boss is cool with it of course). God bless.
I LOVE this Anna Scholz top....it's only $115 (i said that sarcastically)... ....& what about that red dress....I love it..$149 for ya!
I am not sure what get's me into a funk. Could be my actual mood or just that I am plain tired. It's hard to tell getting up at 3am every morning. I mean I guess for anyone having to get up that early will be moody AND tired right? Well I can never tell what kind of day I am going to have until at least 2-3 hours after I get to work. Sometimes I do just wake up nice and chipper but those days are few and far apart.
Taking Alexis to the gym yesterday kinda sucked because she has to be 13 to be able to use the workout machines. I need to talk to the trainer upstairs to see if they will allow her to workout as she LOOKS like a 13 year old and is very mature for her age. I might need to get a Dr's note that shows it's ok for her to work out. We will see. Anyway she can use the pool everyday if she wants and I talked to the swimming supervisor and he will allow her to wear her culotts which are like shorts but looks like a skirt. I would just let her wear a bathing suit but her school prohibts them from doing that (that AND wearing pants) but some of the ladies from my church take their boys swimming there and they go to her school so that's a total no no. Some people don't understand this whole Baptist thing where the women wear only skirts thing. I mean I don't like it because I love to wear nice jeans but I "get" why it's important. It does have to do with a woman looking modest. I mean especially now, the way jeans are made. A woman likes to show off her curves right? But the thinking here is "show your own husband your curves and not everyone else's husband". It's harder for the men to concentrate on preaching and hearing the Word of God when some girl at church is wearing these tight jeans showing her thong or her butt crack to you. KWIM? So yeah...this topic can be controvercial of course but in my case there is really no room for debate because I LOVE my church, Alexis loves the school and so the skirt wearing continues (seems like I am having my own debate in my head).
I woke up with a nasty headache today. I treated myself to a piece of wheat toast with my fake butter (forgot the name of it). Bread never tasted so good :-) Had my coffee but yet I still feel crappy. I was tempted to go to my car and take a little nap for an hour. I might still do that and when lunch rolls around I will work through my lunch so not to cheat my work. We'll see about that. Too lazy to get up right now....Serg is staying home today because it's raining and he can't work in the rain. I almost stayed home but I need to save my vacation days so here I am.
Alright well....I guess I am going to get back to work. God Bless.
I got into a lazy mode yesterday at work where I just really did not want to be bothered by work. I just wanted to read blogs and be a bad employee. But I did work but was also online and got a few good recipes that I want to try out this week or this weekend if time permits.
Last night I got home got some chicken ready to throw into the oven and ran out the door for a 2 hour gym workout. It was the hardest workout I have had to date. What do I have to show for?..... .6 pound loss. It's something. Never enough for me though. I expect too much as always and my expectations are to loose 3 pounds per workout (not really). After I was done I sat in the Sauna for 10 minutes and did some sit ups and some arm workouts. It was gettin' hot up in there though and being that you're not really supposed to be working out in there, I keep it to a minimum.
I finished stretching and walked out of the gym beet red and sweaty. It felt good. Tonight I have to do laundry FIRST then I can go workout (this is according to my husband). Well he is doing the laundry and I am helping. I am supposed to take Alexis with me today so we will see how she does at the gym for the very first time. I might have to call and make a babysitting appointment for Alani so that my hubby does not get irritated at home with the kids. Gotta keep him happy or he's going to give me a hard time everytime I even discuss working out. Don't get me wrong he wants me to workout, he wants me to feel good about myself but he works really really hard, comes home tired and still helps me around the house. Then I turn around and leave for 2 hours everyday and leave him at home to eat dinner alone with 3 kids (2 of the 3 kids=high maintenance). Alani is 2 and is at the age where she's trying to prove herself and Gabriel is just a baby and wants you to play with him nonstop. I would be mad if I was him. So I am really trying to go to the gym right when I get home and when I get back we can all eat dinner together. So I will just continue to try and get on a schedule where mom is making everyone happy. Sometimes you just have to do that.
I made steak fajitas last night for lunch and they look SOOOO good. I made fresh beans in the crock pot too (when you're mexican you always got to have the beans at home or no dinner is complete). I am not really trying to eat them everyday though cause beans = gas and I don't want to let one loose on anyone at the gym. Yes I really think about these things....LOL...I also have a nice breakfast planned..just my typical breakfast burrito with some fresh salsa.
I guess that's pretty much it. Gotta go fill up my 32 ounce water bottle and down it as I do every morning and throw a little bit of makeup on before everyone starts to come in....well maybe I will skip the makeup..I don't really care what anyone thinks of me 4 out of 5 days. God bless.
I actually feel pretty darn good today despite it being Monday and it being 5:00am and all....Friday went really well (the 2nd reformers unanimous meeting). It is seriously coming to light that God chose me to be a leader in this ministry so I can get closer to Him because I am! I asked him for help in memorizing scripture again as I seemed to be having some trouble and it was really starting to frustrate me. I don't just want to memorize it either I want to be able to USE it when helping someone. It helps when you can back up what you are saying with what God says in the bible. This weekend also brought to light how many people actually do not believe in God. The thing is many DO believe but they are mad at Him for reasons unknown to me. I found that most of the people that have confessed their "hatred" for him are because they blame Him for the bad things that happned in their lives. It's hard not to blame Him for things that you think He has control over. Some people though just don't plain believe in Him and feel they are being manipulated to worship something they just don't see. I am not a brain surgeon but I can tell you with 100% certainty that the Lord is REAL. He's shown Himself to me time and time again (not in a spooky ghost sort of way or anything kooky like that) that no one could ever convince me that He is not real. As baby Christians, He shows us he is real because that's just it, we are BABY Christians and we don't believe unless He proves it to us. Now as a more mature Christian, when I pray for a certain thing and it does not happen, I know that He doesn't want that for my life and if I am going through certain struggles, in many many cases, I grow from the experience and instead of getting mad at Him, I take it as another lesson He wants me to grow from. There is so much more I can write about this but not now. Anyway, not sure where that all came from.
OK SO......eating wise this weekend was good BUT not great. Today I am back to my lowest weight yet which is 228.8 and I could of been lower I think but the pizza I ate Saturday night must of not helped. I didn't pig out I just ate enough to say I had dinner. I love pizza though and I always will. If I am gonna cheat, this is the way I will go. Gee, sounds like I am having a love affair. I refrained from eating a lot of other junk food and when the vote from the family was to go out and eat I voted to go home and cook! What?!! Me? I just kept thinking of all the crappy stuff that s in fast food. They trick you to think that even those evil salads are good for you! They take us for fools I tell ya. Ok I'm being weird. Next subject.
I kinda have AF again though which I am tired of seeing! It's like are you coming or going or what?? It must have something to do with the IUD I got put in in January. Not sure but whatever. This weekened I missed taking my Metformin and I feel kinda off in the insulin level sense. I had gotten into a routine this past week and was starting to feel better too. Like my heart not racing so much and a lot of the feeling of being bloated was going away. I even worked on gradually increasing my Met dosage and prepared myself for the headaches and the runs (sorry I know, TMI). I didn't take my blood pressure meds either. Gosh I sound like I am 60 years old!! Another reason to loose weight is to get off old people medication. Mental note #1000.
My hubby bought me some Ralph Lauren sunglasses this weekend and also let me shop and buy 5 skirts, 4 or 5 tops, black nylons and 2 pair of shoes! Love the guy. I'll take a picture with my glasses later. I am the ultimate collector of designer sunglasses, even though I have not worn them very often lately (could be that winter was just over). I am hopefully getting my next pair, God willing, in a month or so. Maybe some Dolce & Gabbana's or some Christian Dior's (pictured above). Well as some of the Australian bloogers say, I have to go to the 'loo' so I got's to go. God Bless.
This is not me either....I am still fat...
Seriously seriously. I am tired. The baby decided he wanted to cry all night. I didn't go to church last night because I wanted to go to bed early to be refreshed today as we have the RU ministry meetings tonight. Well it didn't happen. I am not feeling it quite yet but I know that later today my tiredness WILL kick in. I MAYBE got 1 full hour of sleep which is NOT GOOD.
I weighed myself, no loss. Sucks. I worked out pretty hard yesterday too, over 2 hours. BUT the good news is I feel so much more toned. I don't feel all fat and nasty. I feel like I am playing tricks on myself though because I have only lost a few pounds and how can I start to feel so much thinner? Am I tricking myself into thinking that I AM thinner? I dunno but working out is making me feel less giggly. I think what is keeping my weight at a standstill is me = eating too much chicken. I think I overdid it for a few days on the protein. I need to go back to eating my chicken breast portions. I have issues with portions. Made mental note.
Let's see....my day is set pretty much today. I need to go to either Costco or Albertson's to buy some snacks and drinks for the kids at church today and I am going to squeeze in my 30 minute walk with Florence. We are so funny, we are trying to do belly slimming workouts while walking and we probably looked silly but it tired me out!! We didn't do all of them and we will probably do less today (and go another route) but incorporating them is good I think.
Well tomorrow I plan on sleeping in a bit, getting up to work out, coming back home to make breakfast and help Serg study for his bible class midterm. We have a few moview to watch, probably take a nap (actually this is going to be a must)....then church pretty much all day Sunday.
Alright well hopefully I will have good news to report on Monday. I may even think about coming on to update over the weekend if I have time. Yeah right who am I kidding? God bless.
Man I wrote a long post and lost it!! I guess it too me long enough to write it. Anyway...I will be brief because I don't feel like typing it all over again.
I am down in body fat but up in weight by almost 1 pound. I know that weight fluctuates so I just need to chill. I am an official member of the Jewish Center Gym! Yeay for me. I love working out there and like I mentioned before it could not be more convenient for me. When I signed up the gentleman said that as part of my membership I had use of the heated pool, spa and Sauna. I screamed in my head "SAUNA"!! I love the Sauna. Could never really explain why I likes it so much till I read THIS and according to the article Sauna enthusiasts laud the health benefits of "sweat baths," attributing them with healing, preventative, and cleansing properties. Basically, what happens to the body during a sauna is quite simple — your metabolism and pulse rates increase, your blood vessels become much more flexible, and your extremities benefit from increased circulation. Many people attest to the healing powers of the sauna concerning mental depression and anxiety. They say that after leaving the sauna, the mind is in a relaxed, lucid state, free of the worries of the everyday world. That's how I feel when I walk outta there. Ok well I just got me breakfast together and I must eat. God Bless.
Florence has agreed to a mini challenge to get us more excited about this weight loss. She's very competitive so I am looking forward to this!!! The looser gets to buy the winner the prize below from Tupperware...
This 1st challenge is for 2 weeks and the goal we must reach is 6 pounds! YEAY! She is doing really well too. She's lost 10 pounds since January so she's good competetion.
This is my hubby....LOVE HIM!
Man my eyes are burning! Since starting my serious workouts I have been waking up feeling SOO tired and beat up. I mean what do I expect? I am on the go all day starting from 3AM! Everyone thinks I am absolutely nuts because they all complain about being "tired" and they don't wake up till 7am which is 4 WHOLE hours more of sleep. Man that sounds like such bliss. But they are stuck at work till at least 5pm whereas I leave at 1:30. Unfortunately the really hard work starts when I walk out the door of my building. Sigh.
Ok enough of that somewhat depressing crud. I am down to 228.8 which means that I am down another 1.4 pounds (almost a pound and a half)!! Wow. The bomb. I am debating whether or not I should do a third protein day. I checked to see if I was in Ketosis and I was +5 and I would love to be +10 but I am not sure. We will see how lunch goes. I am going try and run to Albertson's to buy some La Tortilla Factory tortillas and then to Costco to get a Rotisserie chicken and some salad greens. The rotesserie chicken is for lunch and to take home to make something for dinner. I need to make something quick when I get home for the family (but yummy and healthy) and I am also going to throw in a crockpot of beef stew for tomorrow. We have church tomorrow and if I have to make dinner then my gym workout is out the window and we don't want that.
Well I have lots of things on my mind but nothing I care to type about or that I am sure anyone cares to read so I will sign off for now and leave you with the bible verse below. God Bless.
Proverbs 17:22
A merry heart doeth good like a medicine: but a broken spirit drieth the bones.
Gosh lost track of what day this is. Oh well...I was SO tired this morning that when the alarm went off I could not physically scrape my tongue off my pillow to get up....well not literally but it sure felt like it. I am SORE SORE SORE and loving it. So who knew that eating well + working out worked! I am fricken FINALLY down to 230.2!! It only took me...what?....3 months to loose 8 pounds? But now that I am in total focus mode (working out seems to do that to me) I believe you're going to see those pounds coming off alot faster. My big belly is showing significant loss. I should measure my fab bod because Lindora calls for measurements as well so I might get my hubby to help me with that tonight.
Speaking of the evenings...I can't believe how much I have to bend over backwardwards to be able to leave my house to workout! It's unbelieveably difficult and I expressed this to Serg and he apologized for making it harder on me. I cleaned the house, made dinners for two nights, gave the baby AND Alani a bath, got lotioned up and dressed in their comfy home clothes, talked to my sis-in-law while I was doing this about her baby daddy drama, tried to comfort her and be understanding all while thinking in my head "Sheesh girl I got THINGS to do, leave"!!! Is that mean? It is huh? Oh well, I got plenty of things going on in my life and sometimes other peoples problems wear me down. So I got things done, grabbed my towel, water, threw my tennis shoes on and out the door I ran for a one and a half hour workout. I am dedicating 2 hours total per day on cardio (1/2 walk on my lunch hour + 1 hour at gym) then 1/2 hour of weights. I am focusing on my boo-tay cause I want to have a nice rear. I really do. My neighbors, two girls, have that body type where they have NO stomach but are thick girls kinda, KWIM? and their buts are big. Not huge, but the type of butt that looks nice in jeans. My but is not flat but it's just not nice. I am not to check out girls but when a girl has a nice butt it's noticeable.
On a very cool note I got to chat with Beckie and Ashwee....is that cool or what? all the way from Australia. Blogger world is the crazyest thing. Alright well I need to get to work so I can do some bible studying for Friday! Till later, God Bless.
Not being sick is such a good feeling! I have a small cough here and there but nothing major. Just leftover junk from my throat issues these past couple of weeks. I am totally sore though. I spent 2 WHOLE hours at the gym on Saturday. I wish I would of eaten healthy but I was just not prepared. It is hard to do everything. Working out is being forcefuly squeezed in and the expense of other things which I totally do not dig.
I am biting the bullet and writting a schedule for this week including dinners and I am going to have to follow that schedule or things are just not going to get done. I just DO NOT HAVE TIME to make anymore. I mean I don't even have time on the weekends. Every hour is taken, literally. It sorta overwhelms me to even think about it. I forced myself to take a nap on Saturday before I hit the gym and I felt great. On Sunday we came home from church and I cleaned up a bit, ate lunch and made Sergio his lunch for today. Then after I ate I washed some extra dishes and actually laid down to take another nap! I think I took about an hour nap and I didn't even think about going to the gym because there was no time in the day. Then we headed off to church again which we are in the bud kids ministry for 3 more weeks. We have a good group of kids this time.
We had out first RU ministry meeting this Friday and I was soooo tired that I hardly paid attention. I mean I did learn some things but we watched lots of DVD's and I knew we were going to get copies of them anyway so I was kinda there kinda NOT (my head). I am hoping we can go to San Jose this weekend. I have got to figure out HOW we are going to do this with all the commitments we have at church. The only thing we can really afford to do is miss the morning service and even that, we have to get someone to take our place in the Special Needs class. I was thinking we would leave on Friday night after the RU ministry but I have a feeling we will be WAY too tired.
Alright well this week will be interesting for me. I am going for 3 protein days this week. I am going to go to the gym ALL week long as well which I am thoroughly enjoying. I want to break out of 232. I am STILL stuck on that number. I know that working out will help me to loose weight but only if I start to eat better. Otherwise I am just going to maintain and I don't want to maintain - I WANT TO LOOSE. So we will see what these protein days brings me. I think I will be at 228 by the end of the week. Let's just make that a small goal. God Bless.
I finally woke up today feeling better. I don't have that horrible pain in my throat anymore. It's still a little sore but nothing like it has been. I also went to the gym yesterday despite feeling like crud!! I was sitting on the couch with Serg and all of the sudden I realized it was 4pm and we had church and I still had not gone to the gym! I did not make dinner and ended up having a chicken sandwich from Jack in the Box for dinner as I could not fit everything in (like cooking). I only ate the bottom bun (the one with no Mayo) but I also ate two tacos and some fries. There goes my gym workout right? But I also walked with Florence!! I worked out for a totaly of 1 1/2 hours yesterday. Today my "super gut" is mostly gone (except for what seems to be permanently there and won't go away unless I work out 5 hours a day and STOP eating Jack in the Box). I was actually surprised that I even ate Jack in the crack that easily. Sorta scary but also tells me that I let myself get THAT hungry. This weekend I am going to go super grocery shopping and I am planning on making at least 3 crockpot dinners. Low in fat, very flavorful and most importantly ""gym friendly". I just NEED to workout. I can't tell you how great I felt after I left yesterday. I just love that Jewish Center gym!! It's so super convenient and the time working out passes by so fast. I didn't have the guts to weigh myself....and I think I know why I am avoiding the scales. I am afraid of being dissapointed and of giving up so easily. I need to fill my house with healthy foods ASAP. I will get a little sleep in tomorrow, go work out and go to the grocery store. Today during my lunch break, instead of eating at my desk I am going to run to Trader Joes to buy frozen bellpeppers, non fat yogurt, Joe's O's cereal (for my non egg eating days) and some frozen asparagus so I can eat with my baked chicken. I think that's what I am going to make for dinner tonight with some baked potatos.
What else. Chuch was excellent last night. Pastor talked about so many things that made sense. He preached from the boo of Haggai and Ezra. Tonight is the first night of
Day 11 already!! I haven't even weighed myself. I have been so sick for the past two days. I have been working out at the gym though except for yesterday. I was WAY too sick AND not just tired but exausted. My eyes were red all day and eventually got better throughout the day but by the time I got home I was in worst shape. My body was aching, like the flu body aches. I at least got a 1/2 hour walk with Florence during the day. I took a tylenol with codeine as well because my throat was just killing me. I am telling you I have never had such a bad sore throat for this long let alone twice in one winter....and I don't even know if I can really call a Southern California winter....well...a winter!! It's been in the high 70's all week. But I am sure that like tomorrow there will be thunderstorms or something. I think the change in this weather has everyone sick thus making it harder for me to get any better. Anyway I am trudging my butt to the gym today no matter what.
I am so super sore still. My arms are *killing me!! But it's nice to know I got in a good workout. For some weird reason my stomach has been SOOOOOO bloated and I am talking bloated. I have this extra large "tire" on my stomach and it's HUGE. I feel extrememly gassy as well but no gas is coming out KWIM? :-P It's like trapped gas and I have been having to take GasX to help alleviate the gas pain in my upper back. SO super weird. The only thing different in my diet is I have been eating 1/2 a container of non fat yoplait yogurt w/ half a banana and some nuts sprinkled on top for my snack. So I thought I would skip that today and have my usual protein bar. I brought half a can of soup and half a sandwich for lunch. I'm just going to try and keep it plain to see if that will help me.
Well what's new? Besides me and Serg now being leaders of the RU ministry at church. Crazy and scary. I am planning on fasting on Saturday because I seriously need to connect with the Lord and ask him for help on concentrating!! I feel like there is so much bible I need to cram into my head and it's like I feel like I can't learn for some reason. I download Dr. J. Vernon McGee teachings on my computer and printed notes. I am starting with Romans because I need to get Romans down especially for sharing the gospel. I need to refresh my memory on Rom 3:23 when we discuss your realization that everyone is a sinner. Then the penalty of sin...Rom 6:23, Believe Christ died for you Rom 5:8 and then Trust Christ Alone as your Savior which is the 2nd part of Rom 6:23...then prayer to ask Jesus Christ to be your Savior.
I just need to have than down 100% and I believe I do I just need it to come out of me more naturally. When I share the gospel with someone I forget my verses and need to follow the church track. Not sure what's up with that. Alright well I am adding a recipe to my recipe site so I need to sign off. God bless.
That's not me in the pic (just in case you were wondering, I'm still mexican)
I went to the gym last night and man did it feel good!!! I went to pick up my kids and Alma asked me if I cared to join her & Maria at the Jewish Center gym. It's literally walking distance from my house. I've seen it before, I just thought you had to be Jeiwsh to go there but apparantly that's not the case.
Anyway, she called me at 6pm and said that she still had to eat dinner and feed her daughter (she's the same age as Gabriel) and then she would call me on her way out the door. At that point I felt lazy and had those feeling of wanting to cuddle up on the couch and be lazy. But once she called I instantly sprung up, changed into gym clothes & Serg dropped me off as he was going to go to the store. I am so glad I went! We chatted the whole time we were there and it didn't feel like much of a workout at all!! There are so many great things about this place that I am going to try and sell my husband on so he let's me sign US up.
The machines are nice and NEW
No CROWDS!
The people there minded their own business
They have babysitting for $3 per hour for when we ALL want to go together!
It's $77.50 per month for our entire family (which Curves is $40 alone!)
I got a one week free pass so I am going to take advantage of that then try to talk Serg into letting me sign up. Alexis can join with me too because there are tons of kids there, well they have a kids center but she can work out with me. There is also this "Youth Swim Team" she can join for $50 and it's Monday - Thursday from 4 to 5pm. Or she can go swimming while I workout because they have lifeguards there for the kids. I would rather sign her up for the swim team though to keep her motivated. I think this is just what she needs. We just need to be organized at home so we can fit our workouts in to our daily life.
Anyway, I was on the Lindora site today reading success stories and I got even more motivated. I am nice and sore today and I am really going to try and make it to the gym earlier so I can go to bed earlier as well and not be so tired. I have lots of things to do at home today, including folding 2 huge basketfuls of clothes. When I get home today I am going to tackle that while I make some chicken soup for dinner. I don't feel like eating that for dinner but we ARE sick and that's the only food I can really make that will allow me to do other things while it cooks. Well I gues I can bake some chicken as well and finally be able to use some of that seasoning Florence gave me. Serg was supposed to go to school tonight and I was going to run out to the gym after that but I just talked to him and he said he wants to finish doing laundry and getting the house in order. I agreed. I will most likely just walk there, depending on the time and I also want to find out if I can ride my bike there from now on for extra workouts. It would take me 10 - 15 minutes just because I would ride there casually and 15 back so I can add another 30 min to my workout!
Anyway, I have all these projects I am working on at work and I need to get to it! So till later God Bless!
I found that I seriously have to take it day by day. People say that all the time but you think of it more as a cliche type of saying. I have to tell myself "just worry about eating healthy today and we will worry about tomorrow, TOMORROW"!! I of course have to plan my foods but the struggles you go through must be dealt with on a daily basis. I keep asking God to help me and not to give up on me. I don't think He is.
Alexis just called and I hope she's having fun. She said she has a headache and her throat hurts. I dunno but she doesn't sound too good. I have a feeling that when she comes home she will appreciate being home quite a bit. Maybe this is God's way of dealing with her and not such a harsh way but in a way where she will appreciate us as her parents and appreciate her home.
I downloaded some pics from my camera today and sent some to family and friends. I loaded one on here of my three kids. Everytime I see them all in one picture, it hits me. I have THREE kids. Whoa.
Ok well I have healthy eating in mind today. I am going to run to Albertson's later and get some low carb tortillas and make a steak burrito for lunch. I brought the steak from home of course and I have salsa in the fridge. Ok well I need to eat my breakfast so till later.
God Bless.
I am so glad today is my last day on protein. I had a salad last night though cause Serg took me out to dinner and I thought it would be a little weird to just have protein at a restaurant. Like a slab of steak or chicken. We went to The Outback and I resisted eating that warm yummy bread. I had a chicken cesar salad and the only bad thing is that I ate the crutons. They are SO good there though. I should have skipped them but I totally skipped my snacks yesterday because I was SO busy!
Alexis is leaving for Fine Arts in Lancaster with the school and she needed some low heel black shoes and she needed white stockings so I had to run out and buy her some. I ended up buying her one of those rolling suitcases and I am SO glad I did. I got a REALLY good deal on a cute one at Ross. She got to fit everything in there and there were tons of compartments in there. We got her outfits together and now the only thing that she had left to do is pack a cotton comfy top so she can be comfortable on the bus on the way back on Friday. Out of nowhere she had a breakdown last night. I was already asleep and she woke me up and was crying that she didn't want to go anymore and wanted to stay home with us etc. etc....I was like "Great she's already home sick and she's not even gone yet". Too funny. I wish I would of saved my time at work so I could of gone with her. But you know, I think it's kinda good for her to be away from us for a couple of days, she can't be so attached to us you know. The only place she does not get homesick at is at my moms. She is totally comfortable there with them and never wants to come home! So we will see how her trip goes.
The baby has TONS and TONS of eye discharge coming out of his eyes. Last night when we got home he had just woken up and he had all this green nasty stuff all around his eyes and in his eyelashes. I had to wipe it all off for a while. Then this morning I checked on him before he woke up so I could remove all the gunk before he realized his eyes were shut tight. So I am going to call the Dr's and see if I need to take him in because Alma mentioned something about this is the start of pink eye. She said it starts with glossy watery eyes which he has had then they get goopey then the pink eye. So I will see what they say and I kinda wanted to leave early today so I can see Alexis off and possibly have lunch with her but I don't know what the possibility of that is. I will have to ask my boss about it. Anyway, I weighed myself this morning and I showed a gain! I know that it's AF cause I have been eating nothing but protein and working out so I can't see how that's even possible. So I am going to wait again until my monthly (not monthly in my case) but I am thinking you retain water during "that" time so we will see after it's gone. I am hoping I will see 20 pounds come off but when does that happen right? Ok got's go get to work. God bless.
I am tired today. The baby slept with us last night and he kept waking up. He ate twice last night for some reason. He's just growing and I need to start giving him cereal more often so he can stay full longer. Anyway Alexis and I worked out last night! I made a deal with Serg that at 5pm everyday (except Sundays) I am suppose to drop what I am doing and go work out. Well I started at 5:30 cause my house was a mess (cause of the weekend) so I washed massive amounts of dishes, put all the stuff around the house away, got Alani snack and juice, got baby fed and started dinner - all in 1 1/2 hours from the time I got home.
Alexis and I did the elliptical machine for 20 minutes, at 2 minute intervals each. Then I went for a 35 minute bike ride so my legs are a bit sore today. I didn't weigh in because I got up late and had to hurry to get out of the house to allow for more driving time as it's raining today. I am gonna get my breakfast together now, fill up on water and get more coffee!!
God Bless.
Saying this in my head for the next 28 days will help me....For I the Lord thy God will hold thy right hand, saying unto thee. fear not, I will help thee.
The Lord challenges to us to confront Him with things He has written to us in the bible. We just have to have 100% faith that He is good on the things He tells us. Like the verse above from Isaiah 41:13. That was last weeks verse study for our woman's 6 weeks challenge at church. You see the struggle I got going on in my head is "eat healthy foods, don't do Lindora, it's too strict", ya know the same struggles I go through week after week after week. My weightloss HAS to be faith based. I have to remember to call upon God to help me because I can't seem to do this on my own. Even though I start these weight loss challenges with Him in mind. I somehow drop Him along the way somewhere and do it my own way. I so totally need Him and I am pretty sure He is leading me to do Lindora again. Because my body needs the cleansing foods I eat on Lindora. I feel better on it and I loose weight on it (sorry I know I've said this a million times before on here) but it does and NOW that I KNOW God is really pushing me to finish the 28 days STRONG on Lindora, I am up for the challenge because He has promised to hold my hand, comfort me when I am scared and will help me.
Last night after church all the ladies met in the fireside room and compared notes. I felt like a complete fakeout because I totally cheated this weekend and you should of seen them!! They worked so hard and were so proud of their accomplishments this week and I just disregarded the time Alma (our leader) is putting into this to help us be accountable to each other and I just totally gave it up for junk.
Anyway, I need to pay for the Tae Bo Kids DVD I bought on Friday. I won the auction for .99 cents (but shipping is $7.99). Still not a bad deal. The DVD is $14.99 at Target plus tax so it would of been a little over $16. I think Alexis will enjoy it and I am sure I will get a good work out out of it as well. Here is the verse I need to memorize and apply to my life this week:
Deutoronomy 20:4 - For the Lord your God is he that goeth with you, to fight for you against your enemies, to save you.
God bless.
I woke up late today. Intentionally actually. I was SO tired so I just felt like sleeping in a bit. I keep meaning to take a nap when I got home but everyone needs Mom for something. I was so bummed that I did not get to work out last night! I kept trying and everytime I tried to get away it was not happening. Sergio is sick so he did not want to get close to the baby. I started dinner and thought I would run out to the garage to work out but Serg wanted to jump in the shower. He did and when he came out he asked me if I was going to go to the grocery store because he didn't have stuff for lunch. He knew I didn't want to take the baby out so he said he would go with Alexis. All at the same time we talked about when I was going to get tires for my car (the one that he drives) and there happened to be a sale at some tire discount place. He decided to go there and check it out. He calls me 15 minutes later and tells me he's getting new tires put on and it's going to take an hour or so. OK fine, I knew we needed to get tires ASAP as it's starting to rain pretty often and the tires that were on that car were pretty darn old. Anyway, long story short, a 30 minute trip to store turned into 3 hours. He took Alexis to Petsmart to get supplies for her gheko. I even ate dinner alone cause I was hungry and the baby had nodded off.
The one good thing is that I got to spend plenty of time with Gabriel. He was giggling and being silly. He's so cute. I love this age. Except the drooling part.
I WILL get in a workout no matter what today. We do have church service tonight and because of that Alexis does not get homework and so she can watch the baby while Serg takes a shower etc. Then once he's out he can watch the kids and I will workout with her as well. She is doing really good too. I told her I was proud of her to keep her motivated. Lauren was being a brat yesterday and I was glad her dad picked her up early. She was just being a bit abnoxious and she knew I was irritated with her so she was just quiet for a while. Anyway I need to get to work. Till later. God bless.
Thanks Florence for the seasoning you gave me this morning. Smells good and I can't wait to try it tonight on some chicken breasts.
Ok so I weighed myself this morning and I am at 232.2 which I was SO happy about because that is the lowest weight I had gotten to a few weeks back. I went for a late bike ride yesterday with Leah and my butt is killing me! I knew it was gonna hurt but dang!! My inner thighs are sore too which is a good thing cause I got plenty of fat there! I had my yummy breakfast already and I am hoping for another good eating day today. I am going to try and low carb it all day so I can have my beloved tortillas at night - if possible. Last night I had some leftover chicken that Serg had grilled on the BBQ this weekend. I made a salad and some steamed veggies. MMM good. You know what the coolest thing is? My daughter Alexis is totally motivated to eating healthier. I can tell she is having withdrawals from cookies and junk though and I even said it was ok for her to take 2 Famous Amos cookies for lunch(sergio bought them) for lunch but she would not hear of it!! Lauren is also totally wanting to loose weight and eat much healthier than she has been so I want to work out with them to put some pressure on myself and help them burn some calories. This is going to be our schedule:
Monday - 1/2 hour walk at work & Eliptical machine for 30 min with Alexis and Lauren - to make it easier on them (yes...and me) we are going to each take our turn on the machine for 2 minutes intervals. At first I was thinking 5 minutes but it's going to be tough to stay on for 5 whole minutes at first. We need to work our way up first. Once the 2 minutes intervals become easier we will increase it to 3 minutes then 4 etc. When we get bored of this we can go bike riding.
Tuesday - 1/2 hour walk at work & 1 hour bike ride with Leah at 7pm.
Wednesday - 1/2 hour walk at work & Workout with Alexis and Lauren
Thursday - 1/2 hour walk at work - CHURCH night (will try and squeeze in a workout).
Friday - 1/2 hour walk at work & Workout with Alexis and possibly Lauren. She gets picked up by her step dad so I don't give her a ride home. Sometimes she does not though so on this day we will go bike riding once Serg gets home from work so he can watch the kids.
Saturday - Bike ride with Sergio, come home and go for bike ride with Alexis so I can get an extra workout and Alexis can get hers too. if Serg wants to sleep in or kick it at home me and Kid (alexis) can drive to the beach and go up and down those HUGE stairs and go for a 1/2 hour walk. Once we build up or stamina as well I want to ride my bike to the beach, go up and down those stairs AND ride back home.
Since I am incorporating people around me into my "healthy life" it totally seems like this is becoming so much more realistic. It's my home life that usually wrecks my plans so things are really looking up now that they willingly want to be a part of this with me!!
Also at church we formed groups with Ladies that wanted to be accountable to each other to loose weight. The leader of our group is Alma which is also my babysitter and the assistant pastors wife. She is motivating us spititually and she set up this friendly competition against other groups by earning points everyday and it works out so well. We get points for the following:
Prayer/Bible
Scripture Memory
Drinking 64 oz. water per day
Fruit
Veggies
Health Tape or book
30 minute exercise (3 pts per session)
I am actually going to put something like this together for Alexis and Lauren too. I think this will help them. What I will do is buy them an top (shirt)when they reach their first mini goal. The "prizes" will get better and better once they continue to reach their mini goals which I will help them set today.
I AM SO EXCITED!! I am excited for me and for the girls and about this whole thing. The best thing as well is I have Florence at work to totally support me (and me her but it seems like she supports me more)!! She saved me from Wendy's the other day and I am so glad she's there for me in one of the places where there are Donuts bagels and vending machines everywhere!!! Plus we go walking together when the timing for us both works. Ok well I guess that is it. The scripture that I must memorize this week is...
Isaiah 41:13
For I the Lord thy God will hold thy right hand, saying unto thee, Fear Not; I will help thee.
God bless.
Well I haven't been on here like I am supposed to be. Partly because I have been trying to get caught up on lots of things at home. I need to find some order in my house. I feel like even though my house will be clean I am still dissapointed that I can't spend more time getting it spotless. I dunno what's wrong with me at times. I feel like I am more happy than most people. I come into work and I like saying hello to people, and most of them look at me and drag out a "moooorning". I am like that sometimes when I am tired, or sick or things are just not working out that day but some of these people are like this all the time. Anyway, I guess I should be grateful that I am a little more perky. Back to what I was saying. The problem with me I think is that when some teeny tiny thing goes wrong, then I instantly feel let down. I have unofficially stopped doing Lindora. I eat well during the day but usually find myself eating other things I am not supposed to be eating.
Florence has been great motivation but I am not motivating myself. No one can do it for me. I am just going to have to keep trying. I need to keep trying to build my home gym. I NEED to work out hard. Working out keep me from shoving stuff in my mouth that I should not be. I usually see how hard it is to burn 200 measly calories and when you read a bag of snack size Doritos and see that they are 350 calories I usually pass. There's just no way I want to ruin 30 minutes of cardio to eat Doritos. Ya know? So just going to keep trying. The Vegas trip has not really been a motivator because I kinda feel like I may not be going. I gotta break the news to my sister too if I am not gonna go. I would so much rather buy a treamill with that money. SO we will have to wait and see. Anyway, I was super busy on Friday and I need to do some stuff I didn't get to. Until later. God Bless!
I think I got 2 hours of total interrupted sleep last night. My throat is killing me and I think I have an ear infection because I keep getting this sharp itchy type of feeling in my right ear. Anyway I am so dead tired and I have this cold sweat going on. Ugh. I hope it goes away soon. I just went and got some hot tea to see if this will help my throat feel better.
I am glad it's Friday that's for sure. It's supposed to rain all weekend. At least that's what SOME reports say. Some same light showers and others say heavy rainfall. We will have to wait and see.
My parents might come this weekend. My uncle was released from the hospital yesterday since he has no health insurance. I am sure he still needed to be in there for a bit longer but I guess they have no choice really when someone has no health coverage. Then last night I was gonna run out and grab dinner and my Envoy died. It would not start. Ended up being a totally dead battery. So I paid $70 for one that should last 5 years. Oh well it runs WAY better than it did before. I guess the battery must of been low for quite some time. Anyway, I need to drink my TheraFlu so off I go. God Bless.
So yesterday my sister calls me while I am at home and tells me that my uncle which lives not too far away from me is in critical condition somewhere in a hospital. I ask her somewhere? Apparantly he had some kind of injury to his head over the weekend. When he finally got out of the hospital from that he told his girlfriend that he had a bad headache but she was mad at him for being gone for a few days so she kinda ignored him (not realizing that he had stitches and stuff on his head). We I guess while he was sleeping he let out this scream and started to have a seizure and blood started to come out of his mouth. The ambulance came but they could not treat him because of the signs he was showing so they took him in a fire department helicopter to USC Medical. The problem with that is that when the ambulance took him, his girlfriend and everyone else thought he was going to the local hospital. So after searching for him for hours with no luck, the girlfriend calls my mom. This is my moms brother we are talking about. My mom in turn called me cause I think she had a feeling I would find him. I started by calling the police department to find out what ambulance company 911 used to transport him. The ambulance company is not allowed to release information to ANYONE about where patients are transported. So I had to call the Fire Department. The Fire Dept. then gives me the info about where he is at. I was like whew! So I call them right away thinking my search was over. The phone number they gave me? Wrong number. I call back again. Wrong number again. I call 411, no number listed! What?!! USC Medical Center in L.A., HUGE hospital and nobody can find the number?! SO finally I talk to a supervisor at my T-Mobile 411 and she finds the number. I call. No such person here. Long story short, after 5 hours of going back and forth with the Fire Department and Emergency room nurse that admitted him, we find him by his Birth day with a totally wrong name! I called up to his floor and he is sleeping. I call my mom but by this time she's at work already. I talked to my dad and he's leaving a message for her to call me today. You know why I found him? Because God's always by my side....which lead me to this....
I have been feeling a bit "helpless" and whinny about how not fair it is that I can't just be skinny. Not really thinking about it too much, but it seems to be at the back of my mind, and in some ways, it's a resentment I have towards myself. I feel that these thoughts deep in my mind are holding me back. Revelation from God is this: I was so totally determined, I knew I would find him no matter what I had to do, I can easily do this weight loss thing too. The same way. I can. It's as simple as that. It can be done and if I show the same determination I have towards other things in my life, I can have it towards this.
I often write about how "I am gonna do it this time" and my enthusiam eventually dwindles. And maybe my determination will as well after I see this revelation, but I am just going to keep going. I weighed myself this AM and was pleasantly surprised. I thought I had gained all of my weight loss back after this past weekend.
Day 15 of 28
Keto stick: Did not test today
Weight: 233.2
BMI: 46%
I feel like this is a fresh start and I am glad to be where I last left off (plus .4 pounds) but nonetheless it's good enough! God bless.
I messed up this weekend and I have been playing how hard I was going to be on myself about it in my head since yesterday. But you know, there's no point in that because I knew that I was eating things I was not supposed to be eating. I can learn from these mistakes and listen to myself in the future because this is a long journey and I am not quitting because of one weekend.
These are some tips I need to keep in mind:
#1 - Continue to weigh myself daily even if I know the loss is not going to be great.
#2 - Keep logging my foods.
#3 - Write in my blog about how I am feeling
#4 - PLAN PLAN PLAN - I cannot express this enough. Not even to myself.
#5 - Last but not least - Take protein snacks with me EVERYWHERE especially if I know I am going to be out late.
Friday night is when this it all started. I was so hungry and my husband and kids went to In & Out to grab a burger and I got a "protein" burger. Which makes it sound healthy but totally is not.So anyway, live and learn is going to have to be my motto. I totally wish I could buy a treadmill with my tax return but I have so many bills that I don't think I will have any $$ left over to indulge in that. I am going to have to find one of those home bike attachment things. I don't know what they are called, you put it on your bike's back tire, to prop it up and you can use your own bike to work out in and this way you don't have to buy extra workout equipment.
I totally would like to set up my garage as a little gym. I think I might have to get Serg to help me do that. We need a TV back there so I can do my workouts on DVD in there too and I don't have to worry about who's looking at me. The garage is a mess right now though but we can totally clean it out and make it nice.
So I am doing 3 protein days to get back on track. I need to. My stomach is so messed up right now. I need to refrain from giving it carbs and junk. So protein it is. I am going to go to Albertson's for some egg beaters this morning for breakfast and I think I will have the same for lunch as I woke up late today and knew I had some protein foods at work. I need to shake this tiredness off. I really didn't get much rest this weekend. Running here, there and everywhere.
The good news is I did my taxes and we are getting more than I thought. We did the long form because we had write-offs so we got about $1000 more because of that. Ok well I am tired of typing so until later. God bless.
I tried to go to bed early last night but I was with the baby and he didn't feel like going to bed when I wanted to go to bed. But I still ended up going to sleep at around 9pm. Anyway, I woke up a lot last night. Yes the toe thing. Still hurts. Still had to wear that ugly shoe today. Anyway I was not going to weigh myself because I know I ate too much yesterday. I felt like crap all day and was SUPER tired so I didn't end up doing a protein day.
Day 10 of 28
Keto stick: Did not test today
Weight: 232.8
BMI: 46%
Yes those pounds are coming off very slowly. So far, my weight loss is far from my "goal" of 6 pounds. Unless I can loose it in 3 days (yeah right). I have to confess though I am constipated. I have "not gone" in a few days. Also, I am sorta on my monthly. It's kinda like not full blown here but I feel like it is KWIM? I feel bloated, tired and just plain cranky. Hopefully after whatever I have going on goes away I will see at least a pound drop by Monday. Oh so I was saying, I ate too much yesterday AND I am totally not drinking the amount of water I need to be drinking. I need to check myself on that. In fact once I finish this post I am headed straight to the kitchen to fill my 32oz cup for water. It's 5:04am so by 6am I should be getting another one. A light bulb just went on in my head. THAT'S why I am constipated. Duh....I've been a TOTAL airhead this week. Geesh. Ok gotta go before I start making myself mad. God bless.
First thing I did this morning was weigh myself since I missed weigh in yesterday. Here are my stats:
Day 9 of 28
Keto stick: +5
Weight: 233
BMI: 46%
Yes, dissapointed of course. I am really trying to watch myself and I am only loosing very little. I really need those workouts but I can't even puy my foot in tennis shoes right now. I tried this morning but it hurts like crazy so there is no way it's gonna happen. Today I am planning on doing a protein day as well as tomorrow to see if it gets me out of this rut. I am really hoping that by this weekend I will be good to go. I want to ride my bike so bad! My toe is still infected though and I need to go get the antibiotics the Dr. told me to get. So I think I might go during lunch.I made myself a turkey sausage for lunch on the George Foreman grill. I left it in the car so I have to go get it in a sec.
Not much else happening. Tonight is church so once I get home I have to get everyone's church clothes ready and make dinner early. I hope I get myt W2's from work today!! I need to do my taxes ASAP. Ok God bless.
So I left early yesterday to get my toe taken care of and man did it hurt!!! First of all they had to numb my toe so they had to stick a needle in it and pump it with numbing meds and it literally felt like it was going to burst. It was already super swollen and red. The Dr. basically cut half my toe nail off and I could not believe my eyes, my toe nail started to grown down on the side so it was really in there (disgusting visual I know). It looked like razor sharp which is why I was in so much pain. Now it's going to take about 4 months to grow back which should be enough time for my toes to look cute again for the summer. I went home and took a Vocodin. Ok, I NEVER take Vocodin because it upsets my stomach REALLY bad. I went home and had a piece of wheat toast with my low fat peanut butter, sugar free jelly and a glass of milk and took one because I was hurting THAT much. I think I am a trooper when it comes to pain but I was in PAIN yesterday. I even took another one 4 hours later when I went to bed. I was in pain all night though I couldn't even have my foot under the covers. So needless to say I didn't go for my bike ride like my silly butt thought I was. Even if I could of gone for the bike ride, it was pouring outside. So no exercise at all for me yesterday! I am still in quite a bit of pain today. I wore my velour black pants and sweater today because these pants were the only thing I could get my foot through without hurting it. Anyway, hopefully I get better soon so I can get back to working out.
So while I was waiting in the ER to be seen, I was catching up on my reading and in the Lindora book it said that if my color on my Keto stick was not as dark as I would like it, I could do 1 to 3 days of protein days again. I think I am going to actually do that because I am slightly in Ketosis but not much. I didn't even weight myself today because I got dressed before I went to the bathroom and it was such an effort to even do that this morning that there was no way I was going to get undressed again. I can live one day without weighing in. Plus I don't feel like being depressed if I didn't loose or even if I gained! I feel like crap right now, my stomach is all queasy and I look like poop. Oh well, just gotta get through the day. Ok God Bless.
I weighed myself this morning sorta dissapointed that I had only lost .4 pound but in actuality I weight more, I had just lost track of what I weighed. Here are my stats:
Day: 7 of 28
Keto stick: +5
Weight: 234.2
BMI: 46%
My body fat is back down but my weight is up by .8 pounds which is a little over half a pound. I guess this is where I see the downside of weighing in daily. I KNOW that I keep having too much fat in my diet and I need to keep my foods plain and simple. It seems like the turkey products that I thought were much healthier that the regular foods are not much lower in fat. I made breakfast for dinner last night. I should of had egg beaters but I felt like eating eggs over easy. I did and I had 2 sausages. I drank a little milk before bed as my toe is killing me. I don't know what happened but it is infected (sorry yuck I know). I was angry last night cause something ALWAYS happens when I am trying to accomplish something. Maybe God wants me to work extra hard, I don't know. I just know my toe hurts and I am probably going to have to go to urgent care to get it looked at. This is NOT going to make me stop working out. I won't be able to walk very much but I WILL ride my bike.
Yesterday I didn't get to really work out much except for my 30 minutes walk during my break at work. When I got home yesterday I had to pick up the girls at school and then take Serg to the community college to take some tests. He took us home and I was trying to get my toe to feel better. I cleaned up and then started to make dinner. Lauren and Scott were there for a bit and once they left and Serg was not home yet and it was 7pm we had dinner. He ate when he got back at 8pm. I gave Alani a bath, played with the baby, got my stuff ready for today and we read Proverbs 29.
On the way to work I was just thinking about how frustrated I am going to be through this entire journey and how unsatisfied I am going to continue to always be with my body. But you know what? I need to stop being like this, I need to stop hating my body, stop thinking about how much I am going to hate it when I am done with weight loss. I should be thankful that I am even loosing weight and have patience darn it! I get on my own nerves with my expectations and when something goes wrong, I get all psycho and I just need to know that things WILL go wrong. I need to accept the fact that I am NOT going to loose 65 pounds in 1 month and I am just setting myself up for failure if I keep setting these ridiculous goals for myself. Yesterday, I was reading some of my posts from 2005 and I was limiting myself to 25 grams of fat per day, 900 calories and tons of protein. I can't seem to do that now. Oh well, it is what it is. Till later. God bless.
I was actually looking forward to coming in to work today. Weird huh? Maybe because work brings back some normality into my life. I never thought I would say that, and maybe that will change in the future, but for now it's nice to be at work. Yes, even if I have to get up at 3am. I have actually been getting up at 3:30 recently. I shower before bedtime, get my clothes ready, set the coffemaker to brew on it's own and get my lunch ready. I can usually get out the door by 4:10. In the past I would eat breakfast at home but I found that doing that only finds me hungry at work an hour later. So now what I do is drink my hot coffee on the way to work and then drink 32oz. of water once I get here. Once people start getting in, I throw in some breakfast in the microwave. Today I was going to have a breakfast burrito but I don't have salsa, veggies or turkey sausage so I am just going to have some egg beaters with a slice of melted low fat provolone or LF cheddar, a peice of wheat toast w/my fake butter and some decaf. Ok stats for today:
Day: 6 of 28
Keto stick: +5
Weight: 233.6
BMI: 47.5%
Notice my BMI went up. Although in talking to Florence the BMI my scale gives me is way too high but even if it's high it tells me if it went up or down. Also, my weight did not change but my body fat went up? At first I was dissapointed but then I thought about it, I did eat healthy this weekend, but the foods were higher in fat. Another thing that I now realize contributed to my non-loss is that I did NOT drink ANY water all day yesterday. I didn't realize it until after my workout which left me super thirsty. Right then and there, I felt dehydrated. So yes I worked out last night like I said I was and it was a great workout! I was sweating like a pig (do pigs sweat)?? and little Grabriel was in his car seat watching me wave my hands and prance around like a dork. I jumped in the shower while I threw in some Blue's Clues for him, Alani was asleep and Serg and Alexis were at church. I skipped out on church because Alani had not taken her nap all day and she was super super cranky and Gabriel was also asleep when they left and we didn't want to wake them. Not to mention it was cold outside and my sore throat is still there. I took some nighttime cold medicine and asked Serg to give me a massage in bed and I knocked out cold. It was a little hard getting up this morning but I'm here on time thank the Lord.
I feel lighter though which is a plus. I am sure I will meet my "in my head mini goal" of 6 pounds this week. So here's to another week! God bless.
I wish I were more patient when it came to weight loss. It's like, when I decide to loose weight my body should just loose it already and I should be thin like TODAY! It's not like that I know so I need to be patient. Today we had church and I was actually up at 6am again but my throat is sore again. We all seem to be getting sick again. I mean I only had like a few days break. EVERYONE is sick though which does not help our recovery at all. The baby has a runny nose and so does Alani. Poor kids can't catch a break. Ok the baby is awake and drinking his bottle so I have to make this quick.
Day: 5 of 28
Keto stick: +10
Weight: 233.6
BMI: 46.5%
It's not as much as I wanted it to be, I walked quite a bit yesterday but I had hot wings for dinner. Homemade and as healthy as I could of made them. I baked them in the oven and simply poured some Red Hot on them. The fatty part was the skin, I could not get much of it off. This is the FIRST weekend in a VERY long time that I have not cheated. Reading my past notes and seeing how excited I was to be shrinking kept me going. Also last night I went through the clothes my sister Nancy gave me when we went to San Jose and they fit me now BUT they don't look good on me now because of my back fat and stomach. So I hung them up in my closet for inspiration. I have TONS of clothes that I can't wear now because they just don't look good on me.
By Valentines Day I want to be down to about 220, that's 2.5 weeks to loose 13.6 pounds. Wow that's kinda a lot. My body might not be about to loose 6 pounds a week. But it might be, if I really try and stick to the Program. I am taking my walking shoes to work tomorrow and will also ride my bike when i come from work if I STILL can't make it to the gym. My life is too hectic unfortunately for the gym right now. It kinda sucks. I just feel bad leaving my husband with all the kids for an hour.
I can't wait to do my taxes. I am so super broke it's not even funny. I have to pray hard that we get a decent refund. I need to fix my Grand Am, get tires, pay some bills, pay Alexis tuition ahead of time etc. Anyway, I popped in workout DVD, I am going to try out my new hand weights. Just hope the baby kicks it. Curious to see what my loss will be tomorrow in the AM. God Bless.
Finally protein days are over!! I am so use to getting up at 3:00am that I could not sleep past 6am. I weighed myself and here are my stats:
Day: 4 of 28
Keto stick: Don't have any
Weight: 234 (6 pounds lost so far)!
BMI: 47%
Serg was up with me too. We were getting ready to go do laundry because our washine machine is broken but we decided to just make some breakfast and go to the outdoor market. I made myself a yummy low fat scramble with bell peppers, turkey sausage and green onions. I sprinkled a little cheddar cheese on it and had a piece of wheat toast with my Smart Beat butter and a nice hot cup of coffee. MMMM. I made them a scramble similar to mine except theirs had homestyle potatoes and other fatty things. It looked really good. I ain't gonna lie :-)
We needed to buy Alexis a "reptile tank" and I was not going to spend $50 on one. God blessed us with a good deal, $8 bucks for one with everyting in it at the outdoor market. Well it was a hampster one but it's big and has things that we will need. I had not planned on buying anything else but I got some hand weights for $3 PERFECT for my DVD workout which I am going to do later tonight while Serg is at bible college taking a course on bible leadership. Pastor is teaching it and I am SO glad he is taking it. THAT right there was a huge blessing as well. The Lord is good, yes He is.
Anyway, I got Alani and Gabriel TONS of clothes, including Levi's Jeans for Alani, 2 other pairs of jeans, 2 dresses, 1 skirt, 3 tops ALL for $17.00. I also got two of those fish aquarium crib musical things for 50 cents each. Those things are like $35 EACH. I believe God wants me to give them to the couple that just had twin girls. So it's been a good day in my eating and working thus far. Gotta go now though off to Walmart for some home things. God bless.
Wow I am finally at Protein Day 3 which is where I ALWAYS mess up. I bargain with myself and convince myself that I have been "so good" and deserve to just start the program without completing my 3rd and last protein day. I am SO glad I am reading the Lindora book chapters because they seem to be in the same state of mind you are in on most days. I am totally not prepared today. I have no breakfast and thought I had no lunch but I found my Lindora chicken soup thank goodness. I am going to run to Albertsons this morning to get some egg beaters cause I NEED to eat breakfast. I had no eggs at home. REALLY need to go shopping. I have purposely not gone this week though because I need time to shop. I need to go to Trader Joe's, regular grocery store for all the basics and then to Wild Oats to get a few specialty items I can't really get anywhere else. OK so ready for my stats?
Protein Day: 3 of 3
Keto stick: Negative
Weight: 235.2
BMI: 47%
I could not believe it!! Another 1.8 pounds. That is almost 5 pounds in 2 days (today being day 3). I am telling you, this is the only thing that works for me. The concern is always "well are you going to KEEP it off"? I plan to and I have been successful at keeping it off in the past (until I got pregnant, TWICE)! Now anymore, well I really hope that my IUD does what it's supposed to do which I am sure it will.
So yesterday I got home and took a short nap. I planned to ride my bike and when I told Serg he said "well the tires are flat because it's been a while since we rode them" and he had this look "Oh please don't make me go into that messy garage to get your dumb bike out and then I have to put air in the tires". But I gave him the puppy dog eyes and said this "I read in the Lindora book today that people that work out while on the Lindora program lose up to 60% more weight that those that don't. Those that don't lose 1.8 pounds a week versus 3.9 pounds those that DO". He said "ok, ok, take a nap and I will get it". He ended up getting Alexis' beach cruiser out too and we went for a ride. She kept slowing me down though, either her cool-lots (coulots are like shorts but they look like a skirt) were getting stuck on her tires or "her bike would slow down" LOL (basically she was going uphill). She just learned how to ride her bike before she left to my moms this past summer. So she still has not caught on to the whole "it's way harder to ride uphill". So funny. So after 20 minutes of me waiting for her to catch up to me I said "let's take you home" and so I did and I rode hard for a good 15 more minutes. When I got off the bike my butt was killing me and my legs felt like they were going collapse. It felt GOOD though and I still can't believe I actually did it, and on a church night!! This weekend I plan on working out both days.
The hard thing about yesterday was makng them dinner. I made them some yummy spaghetti but with Riggatoni. I added some parmesan/Romano cheese and some monterey jack cheese to make it cheesy. The only healthy thing about the meal was the ground turkey. I had a grilled salmon fillet in the fridge which saved me! It was good but of couse I wanted some of that spaghetti. I reminded myself over and over again how BAD I wanted this. I am sick and tired of being fat and cannot wait to go shopping!!!
I am glad for the shedding of the pounds these past couple of days because it gives me momentum for the weekend. I will go grocery shopping today and be prepared. I already know that I am going to have a nice fat veggie and ham scrambble with some toast (with my fake butter LOL) and coffee for breakfast tomorrow. MMMMMMM!!
I am going to try and make those chicken satay skewers and am hoping I can find some low fat peanut butter, which I am sure to find at either Trader Joe's or Wild Oats. Well I think that is it for today. I am going to continue and search for yummy recipes today and this weekend. Gob bless.
Ok first off let me do stats:
Protein Day: 2 of 3
Keto stick: Negative
Weight: 237
BMI: 47.5%
Not that I think I lost 2.8 pounds of actual FAT in one day. I went to the bathroom SO many times yesterday. I must of been retaining lots of water. My BMI went down too though. We'll see. I've seen a big loss before only to bounce back a pound the next day so I am not getting excited just yet. So I was reading my Lindora book yesterday (because I always forget many things about this program) and I forgot I follow the program to a T for 28 days. Once those 28 days are over, I add more food, or do what they call "Phase 2: Metabolic Adjustment" for 14 days. Then I can come back and do 28 more days to loose more weight if I have more weight to loose which I totally need to. I was looking at my old notes/menus and I had lost 20 pounds by day 20! My notes and old menu's are really going to come in handy because I can go back and see what foods I was eating when I had big losses. So far it looks like I lost several pounds a week when I had shrimp. Weird because I think shrimp is the "fattier" fish. I love salmon but noticed I would not loose very much when I ate it. So it's interesting. I also noticed I would have a loss only when I limited my beef intake. If I had it one day I would lose, the second day I would lose a little less but by the third day there was no loss. Basically I think I will need to change it up daily. Chicken one day, fish (or shrimp) the next, and then steak (all with veggies and salad of course). Now I can't wait to be able to eat fruits and salads again.
Last night Alexis went to Chuck E Cheese with the twins (my neighbors daughters) because it was their birthday. Anyway, Serg said "So what's for dinner"? and then continued to say "Oh yeah....protein...." (because he remembered that I hated to cook when I was on my protein days). I think I told him not to go there and wanted to cook just so he would not learn to 'hate' my protein days. I think he has a harder time when I do my protein days than me. Seriously. I have to go to the grocery store because I need so many things. So I made him breakfast for dinner! Man I am not gonna lie, it looked SO good. I made him blueberry pancakes, spicy louisiana sausage and two eggs over easy. I made myself some steak and it was actually pretty good and I felt satisfied to the point that I didn't even have a snack before bedtime.
I woke up with a headache today. This darn headache is a serious pain. I only had one tylenol left but I need to go out and buy some Exedrin. That's the only thing that's going to get rid of this stupid thing. I actually went to bed at 8:15 last night. I always think I won't be able to fall asleep but always do within minutes. I am working on my other blog to get my recipes all in one place but am struggling a bit because this guy at work that sits accross from me is so super nosy and gets up from his desk like a million times a day and stares at my computer. He's a snitch too and if my boss does not care why should he? Anyway, I need to go fill up my water cup and get some green tea to see if that wakes me up or gets rid of this annoying headache. Until later. God bless.
Wow so I feel pretty good today! Today is DAY 1 of me being on Lindora so I have 3 days of strictly eating protein. With a little planning and motivation I can stay on track and LOVE the results. EVERYDAY, let me repeat, EVERYDAY I am going to come on here and log my weight and stats (even on weekends). This is what you are going to see daily:
Protein Day: 1
Keto stick: Neg, positive +1 (or +2 etc).
Weight: 239.8
BMI: 49%
This is in addition to logging my foods in FitDay. Ok so let me continue....with Lindora you don't have to work out a whole lot BUT when you do the results are AMAZING. I never recommend Lindora when I start to loose the weight because it is really difficult. But it's the only thing that works for me. I talk myself out of it a lot of times because I can't eat meals with my family and I start to feel bad. I talked to Serg last night and I told him that he could not do that to me. I need to loose this weight and he can't make me feel guilty for eating the things that I need to eat to stay on plan.
I had also bought the book Cook Right For your Type and most if not all of the foods that Lindora restricts are not good for my O+ Blood Type. Wouldn't you know that MY blood type is the one that #1 has to work out the hardest, #2 - Wheat products aren't tolerated by Type O's AT ALL (bye bye wheat bread). It contains lectins that react with my type O digestive tract and blood and interfere with with the proper abosorption of beneficial foods. Most importantly it said that IT CAUSES WEIGHT GAIN because glutens in wheat germ interefere with metabolic processes. SO I need to stick to Rice flour and buckwheat which I have NO IDEA where to buy or what they taste like. I can have wheat occasionally it says. I have to learn to read labels more carefully again because lots of foods have wheat and you would never know it.
There are even fruits I need to say away from like melons which have a lot of mold and Type O's have a proven sensitivity to mold. WEIRD HUH!!? Also I love juice but of course, the only juice good for Type O is, yep Vegetable juice. Pineapple juice I found will help me avoid retaining water and bloating!! I read the other blood type acceptable food and they are totally opposite of each other. My beloved coffee will eventually get written out of my menu as it has high stomach acid levels. I will not however give up my morning coffee. Nope, can't do it. They recommended I drink Green Tea for the caffeine so I am going to try that a few times this week to see if it really works. I think it's a mental thing with the coffee. This whole thing about me "needing" it is probably non-sense.
I am going to continue to read the book until I get a sense of what foods I should really be avoiding because it seems like something is up with me and my weight. Today I am going to once again start taking my PCOS meds like I am supposed to. I was getting bad side affects because I was taking 500mg in the AM, which worked fine but then I took 1000mg at bedtime and that was making me feel super ill. So at lunch I will take 500mg then at bedtime another 500mg. I looked at some notes from 12/4 and I gained 8 pounds instead of loosing. That is flippen sad. I am hoping to loose 20 pounds a month so we will see how that goes. I just want to be at 200 which is really the lowest I had been in years. I am carrying these stupid extra 40 pounds which just make me look FATTER. I need to be in the 200 which is my FAT stage. That's where I last left off and I want to see how much farther I can get. God bless.
Ok need to get this off my chest. I am upset. I guess you can say I am upset at my body and metabolism. I hate having PCOS. I weighed myself this morning and I didn't loose ANY weight!! I did have some pizza during the game on Sunday but geesh to have NO loss because of one meal is crazy. I have been eating SO good for quite some time now and no loss?!! Ugh. I had the worst migraine for 2 entire days this weekend which really sucked. On Sunday when I pretty much had it with this headache I gave int o eating pizza. My head is still aching from it can you believe it? I am frustrated to say the least. One thing I can say that is my fault is that I have not been working out as hard as I need to be. I expected to loose weight by eating better and working out very little.
I did throw in the Prevention 3-2-1 workout DVD yesterday afternoon and my legs are actually sore today. I brought my workout clothes to work (finally) so I could join Florence on her walks during lunch. This morning as I was in the shower I literally felt like crying but didn't because I am NOT going to feel sorry for myself anymore. I have PCOS, yes it is hard to loose weight when you have this, and the meds I am on give me this horrific headaches and make me feel like I am going to puke 24/7 but OH WELL!!? What else am I going to do? Give in and stay fat all my life? I want to desperately be much slimmer and maybe that is giving me some anxiety about my weight not dropping. It's just too darn bad that I don't have a fast metabolisms. I need to accept THAT and move on.
I decided once again that I NEEDED to get back on Lindora. The eating is not much different than what I am doing now, but it's something about doing those 3 protein days that gets my body into gear. It's like a slap in the face for my body and me saying "You are loosing the weight wether you like it or NOT"!! Seriously. So I need today to prepare, to read my Lindora book. Reading a chapter in that book daily keeps me going. I need to make a grocery food list of what I need. I need to buy eggbeaters for sure.
I missed work yesterday because I had to take Gabriel to get more labwork. The poor kid still has diarrhea and the most horrific rash. We can't even wipe him with wipes anymore. We have to wash his bottom with soap and water because his bottom is that bad. I feel so bad for him and it's like the Dr's can't really do anything until the lab results come back. The solution is not diaper rash ointment but getting rid of the diarrhea. The Dr said he would be testing for Rotavirus and NOW that I really think about it all these diarhea problems started when he got his 2 month shots which included that NEW oral rotavirus vaccine. Great! I am going to call today to let him know so he can get those lab results back ASAP!
Anyway, yesterday I was on the bigest loser website for a while. Trying to get motivated. I thought that by seeing all those people loose weight I would want to and I do but I just feel like I am so tired. I know I am this tired because of my weight. I am very heavy right now. If I really think of it, I am at one of my 2nd biggest weights. The first two weeks of working out is going to be hard but I need to stick to it. Maybe the walks with Florence will kick in the motivation. I had an idea on my way to work this morning. I can take Alexis to sell her candy at the Aquarium and hopefully when I get my taxes, I can buy a used double stroller and take both kids with me on speed walks on the marina. I will talk to Scott about checking out some candy for Lauren as well so she can stay there with Alexis. That will get the kids out of the house, some alone relaxing time for Serg and Alexis can sell candy to pay for her school tuition. ;-) I will be back later.
